#333- Social Media Break in Magician Card

There’s no reason for me to go back to Facebook, but I want to be nosy sometimes. Like really nosy. It wouldn’t be good for my mental health. Originally I planned to only leave Facebook for a few months, but why put a timeline on it? I certainly could leave for a week and no one would notice. Or I could leave for 6 months, a year, or longer. I could never come back and I’m sure only those that care would message me through FB messenger. I could care less. A part of me felt like I had to go back, but honestly I’m much happier not going back.

I don’t have to see the happy moments of other people which are unrealistic and I don’t have to compare myself to these people. No one shows their rough times so everything looks picture perfect and it can be very hard when I start to compare myself to that. So why go back?

I was tempted to go back and shut down my entire account but I realize it’s just another excuse to go back. To have a reason to. I could literally abandon my account as it is and never come back. It’s very triggering to be there and even looking just once(out of curiosity) would set me back emotionally and be a big distraction because someone I know there always posts particular things that always make me unhappy.

So why go back.

It’s rough because I love sharing things with people, but honestly I share it here or other places. I don’t need Facebook. People who heart my posts but wouldn’t bother to check in with me through messenger even if I do that for them aren’t worth it.
I want genuine connections and I won’t find it there. I’m doing the best thing for myself by not going there no matter the reason.

Seasons change, time will go on, life will go on, amazing things will happen. And I don’t need Facebook for any of that.

Anyways, today I just feel like crap. My period started and I feel yucky. Been in pain, cancelled all my plans for today because I almost vomited as well.
I feel guilty for not exercising because I ate an entire cheesecake and also some Udon noodles over the last two days. However, it’s okay. I’m trying to reassure myself that one bad day doesn’t ruin everything even if it feels like it will.

I just napped away most of the day, rest was being in pain and being unable to go to sleep because of the pain. I couldn’t relax properly.