Nothing changed for me in a year in Everyday happenings

Last year I didn’t have the energy to write this year I don’t have the energy to speak, so I am writing tomorrow it my exam and I am not prepared. I only feel hurt and pain on behalf of my family who invested so much money and time and effort in me and I ruined it all for myself. People my age have already started their career or will start after tomorrow as they clear the exam and make the cut and I am still here. It hurts to see the exhaustion on my parents face the disappointment on my siblings, I don’t have the confidence to face my friends now or tell them the truth. Truth is I wasted my second opportunity, I wasted my another chance I didn’t care enough and look here I am. Lost and failed, a parasite on the essence of this house! Oh how shocked and insulted my self would feel. I am doing everything I thought I never would. I no longer can hold my head high for I see I have nothing to be proud of.