February 10, 2023 in Pregnancy Weight Loss Journey

“BREAKFAST”
16 oz Chai latte

LUNCH
1 cheddar bratwurst w/ half a bun
1 cup of creamy chicken and vegetable soup

DESSERT
1 serving of Devina’s 85% dark chocolate

SNACK
1 serving of turkey jerky

DINNER
2 pieces of whole wheat toast
2 eggs

SNACK
1 serving of Strawberry & Chocolate Cheerios (measured out)
1 serving of milk (measured out)

NOTES
Donut guy forgot the donuts this morning. Which I was happy about. But then I had no plan for a breakfast and I was hungry by 9:30, so I got a chai to stave me off.

I think I did pretty well today. I’ve been meaning to try that cereal, but just did not want to write it down. Shockingly there are only 11 grams of sugar per serving, which is less than most. It was good, but only something I would have if I had a real bad hankering. It’s been here for over 2 months unopened. So that’s pretty good.

I don’t imagine I’ll be down any weight this week. But I honestly feel like I’m starting to flirt with an eating disorder of sorts. I’ve had issues with food before. But I had been getting what I would describe as a “high” feeling from not eating for 14/16 hours. Not hungry. Starting to get lightheaded and shaky. But it actually feels good. If I wasn’t breastfeeding, I might try to see how long I could go without eating. See how far I could push that feeling. And that’s scary, because that’s not safe.

It wasn’t even something I was TRYING to do. I would just be mindful of what I was eating, so trying not to eat a bunch of shit, get preoccupied, and then realize at 9am that I hadn’t eaten since 5pm the night before. And I would start to have a physical reaction to it, as described above.

I do still want these last pesky pounds gone. I want to see the same number that I saw the day I found out I was pregnant. But I’m not going to starve myself to do it. No matter how good it might feel.