Be together or keep fucking unknowen women at bars. in psycho shit

Suppose it is time to update here. Off from work since last week. Not doing much. Travelling to Berlin alone next week. Going to push and hit on women like there is no tomorrow. Lisa wanted to come, no fucking way. Going with her to Italy to visit her family later this summer.

It is bloody boring to go out with your "date" or travelling. You can aswell lit your cash with a candle.

Had an argument with Liza at night and it continued in the morning. To sum it. I am a retard who does not want to have a future like marrige and live together. I also fail with simple things like opening the door for her. She is right. And I got not clue what so ever why she even put up with a retarded guy like me. I even think to myself that I am a retarded asshole in some ways. What does she see in me?!

It is strange why she wont let go. It is like she got a fix idea that we should get together and form a family with kids. Parts of me like that. My retarded part miss the nightlife and women you dont even know on bars. My bastard friend is even worse then me. He got kicked out last night. Today he felt sorry for himself and is sleeping on my couch. Oh well. It was his own bloody fault. Going to travel with him up north later.His fiancee found out about the women we met last week on Bar 101.

I am too old for this shit. Why cant I be a normal person?????