so yeah. it was. a thunderclap. but. in 2022.

so yeah. it was a thunderclap but. the cause isn’t as bad as i thought. the cause. is a burst blood vessel in my brain which. obvi isn’t good. so. going to take untill sun. [as it’s mon.] to recover. er. to repair itself.
right, i cancelled my thurs. appt. and let the lady know. i um. ........... no that’s right i did, at 1 this a.m.
as for my migraines. well. apparently a cause isn’t, emotional drainage my bad it’s just a trigger. a reminder, as i call them. i. i don’t know...............i’ve had headaches due to barometric pressure. but i don’t think that’s the cause. then what the hell is it? i. right now i don’t know. in the fall they might change i might have less in sept. i. it’s just frustrating.
oh, as for my lady parts. i. well at my mom’s i’ve been using well, cold therapy, to be. ..............and that’s helped. a lot not at first cause god it triggers the hell out of my nerve endings. and there are a lot of nerves down there. yeah. i. idinno............. i push it against my lady parts. and then self-talk myself through it. i’ve been doing it 2x a wk., the past..............mmm, 2 wks. it helps, physically and medically. but not so much emotionally. i. but i stop when it gets too intense. oh. omygod...............and it’s. it’s hard bc of ‘you know, that’ in the words of my friend Mark. ok so ‘that’ being.................i was raped. at age 17. and 24. and 25. so.........yeah. and it’s really unfortunate that might be why. i. i don’t know, if it is. .............. but i’m. i’m taking my time w/ it. w/ the um. cold therapy. yes............but the fact that i’ve had migraines. and a lot going since well. feb. certainly doesn’t, w/ my emotions. er. .................i. right now. i don’t know how to articulate that and. honestly i don’t think i want to.
so. idinno.