Donut Cowboy Disappointment in These Foolish Things

  • Sept. 12, 2021, 10:10 a.m.
  • |
  • Public

Out on my morning walks with Martini this weekend and ran into the Donut Cowboy both mornings!

Yesterday we did a long walk, taking the longer trail outside of the park and around the college grounds, through the trees and tunnels and had a long, long talk which included lots of flirting by DC and even some blushing by me.

Judging by the conversation and his actions (touching my arm a couple of times), and how we were laughing and getting along, I was sure that this was going to lead to at least some kind of date situation beyond walking our dogs in the park.

Yet, he still didn’t ask for my number and I was fine with that because I knew he was going to be out walking today and we could continue our walk and talks…

This morning, sure enough, we found each other on the park trail and we walked together. And after our conversation yesterday, I was finally ready to ask directly about his relationship status (we’d talked yesterday about past relationships and some of the women he’d been seeing lately).

But I wasn’t quite prepared to hear that he’s actually married!

Of course, he emphasised the word “separated” because that’s what married dudes do, but after more probing from me, I found out that he’s actually still living with his wife.


What a major, major disappointment. Here I was, thinking I’d had an incredible meet cute situation when in actuality, I was being played with by a man going through a midlife crisis.

And you know what else I figured out? These “walks in the park” are his M.O.! Apparently, he takes his dog to other parks and meets women this way. No dating apps necessary! It’s pretty smart, but I’m just so weary of all of this.

I will never date/mess around with a married guy - even if separated (and this guy isn’t even technically separated). There’s nothing wrong with taking walks with the guy, but I’m kinda over that now.

I just wonder where taking the high road will ever get me?


Last updated September 12, 2021

Elaine Benes September 12, 2021

So many times I found this out too!! These dudes measure their “separation” by whether they are still having sex with their wife. Twice I can recall I actually ended up on a date with dudes who turned out to be still living with their wives. Fuck these guys.

Athena September 12, 2021

Ugh. Separated by a door maybe.

Complicated Disaster September 12, 2021

Ugh! That sucks balls! Xx

bouchie September 12, 2021

Why are men?

Fred September 12, 2021

Ugh. Well, if he’s really separated maybe he’ll reappear in to the picture one his divorce is through…?

gemidevi September 12, 2021

Well, at least he didn't tag his conversation with this fabulous view on marriage, like a man did to me a few weeks ago, "marriage is overrated". And proceeded to ask if I wanted to "hang out". Like, what?? (He is a coworker and that was not the direction I was expecting our meeting to go in!)

Le Sigh.

plushcreep September 12, 2021

I guess if there's some small silver lining to all this, at least you found out early on. Still: ugh.

bobbi01 September 13, 2021

Good on you for asking. Ugh how calculated of him.

Marg September 13, 2021

Ugh what a disappointment! I had to live with my ex for 8 months after we were separated until I found somewhere else but no way could I have even contemplated going out with anyone else at that time.
He on the other hand ……😠

WhatDreamsMayCome September 13, 2021

Hoping the high road takes you to the places you really want to go.

colder September 13, 2021

Taking the high road is one of those things that I believe we will always be glad we did, in the end. 🙂

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