Anxiety every morning when I wake up in Aftermath

Im so hard on myself and everything right now.

I feel empty sad grieving
Fuck everything. No patience

I don’t feel like communicating with anyone right now BC I have no patience

I am more intelligent than them and it’s fusterating to once again be conscended to..when I know what I want and know more than them.

I hate everyone, no one loves me or meets my standards In terms of respect towards me

I just want to move but it’s so hard to do so, I have the funding through an organization but it’s like a carrot on a stick BC it’s not easy to move

I hate my pmdd, it really sabatoges my ability to be patient with people and avoid bullshit because not everything needs to be said or criticized outlout esp when said ppl are extremely defensive and don’t take accountantability

Me and mom are fighting, I’m glad and I’m not. Lately she’s been very quietly hostile towards me and I don’t know why. She is also nitpicking towards me and I cannot take it rn or ever but esp right now she offers to help me BC I have mental and psychical disabilities but she acts like I’m a burden the whole time and its upsetting I tell her but she doesn’t care. Typical

14 days till Aug