Oh, get over yourself. in The OpenDiary (OD) Days!

  • June 1, 2005, 1 a.m.
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Oh get over yourself - 6/1/2005

There are these friends who play golf together every Saturday. One Saturday they were getting ready to tee off when a guy asked them if he could join them. The friends looked at each other and then looked at the man and said, "Sure." So they teed off.

About two holes into the game, the friends got curious about what the man did for a living, so they asked him. The stranger told them that he was a hitman. They nervously chuckled.

The man said, "No, really! I am a hitman My gun is in my golf bag. Carry it everywhere I go. You can take a look, if you like."

So one of the guys decided he would. He opened up the bag and sure enough, there was this rifle with a huge scope on it. He got all excited about it. He said, "WOW! I bet I can see my house through here! May I look?"

The stranger said, "Sure."

So the man looked for a second and said, "YEAH! I can! I can even see through my windows into my bedroom. There's my wife, naked. WAIT! There's my next door neighbor! He's naked too!"

This upset the man, so he asked the hit man how much it would be for a hit. The hitman replied, "It's $1,000 every time I pull the trigger."

The man said, "$1,000? Ouch! But okay. I want two hits. I want you to shoot my wife right in the mouth. She's always nagging at me and I can't stand it. Second, I want you to shoot my neighbor right in the dick, for screwing around with my wife."

The hitman agrees, lifts the rifle and looks through the scope. He looks for about 5 minutes and the man starts to get impatient. He asks the hitman what he is waiting for.

The hitman replies, "Just hold on now...I'm about do the job with ONE BULLET and save you a thousand bucks."

Well it's 11:26pm and my boyfriend's not home..again.  No no, it's not what you think.  I'm sure he's not out sleeping with some other guy lol (although he's definitely capable of doing so), but I do have to wonder what he's up to.  I've decided that maybe he got called into work, as it was suppose to be the 2nd of two days off for him.  But now that it's 11:30pm, hmmm he must be at a friend's house.  If it's that 'Matt' guy I'll probably be a little concerned, but Lukey said he couldn't stand him.  I wonder if he sucked him in with his assets (his car, you dirty ppl lol).

I dunno what's up my ass lately.  I'm jsut glad I'm a quiet person because if I actually had the guts/immaturity to speak before I think, I'd probably be apologising to a lot of people today.  I was just in the worst mood today!  Like a customer at work would ask me for something, and although on the outside I'm like 'Yes, sure ma'am, I can help you, I'll be right back" or "That's no problem", inside I was thinking "Oh fuck off you idiot, I mean are you stupid or what?" sorta thing.  LOL, I was in the coldroom trying to calm myself down, trying to figure out what the hell was up my ass and why my mood was so bad.  It wasn't over-the-top, just enough to be mildly pissed off when I really had no reason to be.  I've really gotta be careful of that, it does crop up sometimes, and if Lukey's around when it happens I can sometime say stuff that I don't mean.  It's happened a few times and I've explained to him I'm sorry.  For example, sometimes Lukey will tell me something that happened during the way that was quite amazing, like hard to believe and I'll go "Fuck off!" which actually means "That's unreal! You Serious?!", but Luke will take it as 'Fuck off!' lol.  I remember the first time I said it he got upset and pissed off with me and I felt strange cos it's just something I say that comes natually to me, probably the result of hanging out with many straight friends in high-school and even today.  The second time I said the same thing, and I saw the look on his face and before he could say anything I said "Remember it doesnt mean how it sounds!" - he just smiled then and seemed to relax a bit.  I dunno, I cant change the way I express myself and it's only two words.  This doesn't really have anything to do with the being pissed-off-for-no-reason thing, but I'm really tryna figure out what's draining my happiness lately.

Okay I got through today alright.  Three more to get through til my holidays start.  It's funny how things seen to happen at once.  Like my ex's last day of work is this Friday at my old work, 'Ness' leave's for India like in 4 days and my holidays start in 4 days.  Just realised they are all happening at once, strange.  I'm going to Mark's party at my old work on Friday.  I told my manager I might be late on Friday because of it, and he said that was cool.  It'll be good ot see him again.  He reckons he's going to have to dress up to impress me cos he knows I'm coming.  I'm not sure how to feel about that - flattered I guess.  He's my ex, whom I broke up with a year and a half agoish, but he really is a really great guy.  Truthfully it wasn't a mutual attraction when we went out, and it was the hardest thing I've done in my life breaking up with him, cos I knew how much he loved me and what a great guy he really was.  Anyway that's in the past and he's been with a few guys since then, still on the search for the right one.  I think I must've been the closest to what he's looking for.  I just hope he doesn't compare his boyfriends to me.  I dunno, maybe I'm being a little egotistical, but he did make me feel special.  Not in the way Lukey does though.  It feels so right now.

So we're doing stocktake at work.  Tomorrow is the big day where all the stocktake-people come in and count all our stock for us.  I'm sure they are going to put our stock-counts way out, but hey what can ya do, we'll just have to go through and fix them all up, not that I'll really have to worry about it as I won't be there hehe.  I looked at my roster and it seems so weird seeing my name with N/A written in every day instead of my usual hours - YESS!  Just gotta get to that stage hehe.  I know I'll do it.  Only 3 days to get through/25 working hours.  C'mon holidays!  I know I'm looking forward to them and not having to work for a month, but I know I'm gunna get so bored, I always do.  I really need to organise stuff to do, and one is my trip to Toowoomba, but since I got a message from Kristy today saying she's moved IN with her boyfriend she's known for like 2 weeks, that might not happen :(.  It'd suck if I couldn't talk to her!  I sent her a reply to her excited message, 'awwww! does that mean i can't come see you next week?' - lol no 'congratulations or anything, just me being upset I couldn't see her anymore.  I felt so bad about that.  I AM happy for her, more than ever cos I've never seen her as happy as I have seen her since she met Gordan.  And Gordan's cool too, I can say that now that I've met him.  His he's taking away my Kristy!!  haha nah, that's alright, I still wanna be able to hang out with the chick tho!  I mean I could stay with John and Mandy, but Mandy has kids and it probably wouldn't be as exciting.  As great as John is though!  I still haven't met Mandy.

I'm watching The Real World.  First decent one I've seen since I've vaguely been viewing it.  Probably cos there's a few hot guys in this one as well as a gay guy, and the chicks want the hot guys and he's jsut sitting back jealous as hell cos the guys are straight haha.  Certainly sounds like real life doesn't it?  I remember growing up as a teenager I'd always hear the girls saying 'All the hot guys are gay!'.  Hmmm, in a way I can see their point of view.  A lot of hot guys I see actually turn out to be gay, much to my surprise.  But my gaydar's improved a lot since then.  I've known a lot of hot straight guys as well, especially one of my previous workmate's, who used to relay to me all the chick's he'd fucked over the weekend.  And you know, gay guy hearing about a hot straight boi getting action, yum yum lol.  And it was interesting, cos at a party once, I was talking to him, (us both under the influence of alcohol) and although he was successful with his looks and personality into getting sex, I found out he really was a lonely person.  It stunned me to tell you the truth.  I dunno where this is coming from.  My diary entries are usally all over the palce like this - i dunno how you guys keep up haha.

Oh I was talking to Michael at work today.  He's a pretty popular guy with a lot of the staff cos he's funny and has a great personality, but me and him hardly ever spoke to each other.  But today in the lunchroom we did.  I mean it is awkward when there are only the 2 people in the lunchroom, because the 3rd person they were talking to walks out to return to work, leaving the 2 of us there.  So being the conversationalist he is, he spoke first.  We just started talking about crap, whatever, I cracked a few jokes here and there and made him laugh.  i dunno I guess it just breaks the ice a little for further time we might talk.  Or maybe not.  A lot of the time it just goes back to how it used to be, like when we barely spoke at all.  i don't mean that is in just Michael, but a lot of staff there.  Peers generally stick together I've noticed.  Peers with peers and Gays with gays, which explains why Naomi and I are always bagging out the straight staff members lol.  I often wonder what the staff and customers think when we run up to each other screaming 'CHICKEE!!!!!" and "CHOOKIE!!!!" (are our affectionate names for each other, me being 'chickee') and give each other a huge hug in the middle of the shop floor.  We don't care.  Some people actually though we were together when I first started there shivers - as much as I love her as a person, the thought of a gay guy with a lesbian makes me feel really weird!  Oh I also found out one of the (apparently gay) customer service staff, Andrew, is actually 17.  I thought he was like 20 or 21!  Just really smart for his age!  Cos he asked me if i was going to the staff cruise, and you have to be 18 to consume the alcohol on-board, which he will be in September.  I was like, 'You mean you're only 17?!" and he's like "yeh!" - gee, where have I been.

I think I'm feeling better.  Past midnight, still no Lukey.  Ah well, I'm not worried.  Take care guys!! xx

Notes: --------------------------------------------------------------------

I wonder where he is? That's kinda random.

I get in those moods sometimes when I have no idea what it is ... but everything just seems to annoy me. I completely understand that feeling. Blah! [Orange Blossom] 6/1/2005 11:48:35 AM

i love the joke thingy... you always have the best jokes...

yeah for you.

hope all is going ok. [fries] 6/1/2005 2:05:26 PM

He'll be home (well, probably already is by the time I'm writing this note) I'm sure. I'd say not to worry, but you already aren't, so it's fine.

You guys have a staff cruise? That's pretty cool! I hope that somewhere I work does that.... --Matt [Matteo Al Monty] 6/1/2005 9:25:43 PM

iiitttttttsssss ttttttttrrrrrrrrrrruuuueeeee all the hot guys are gay. well.. ok not ALL, but, a clear majority,

EVERYONE says that at my school, haha, [penfifteen] 6/1/2005 10:35:37 PM

What does the end of joke say? I can't see it! [frangipani] 6/2/2005 1:19:02 AM

hey...yeah you are hard to keep up with at times, dont know HOW we all manage!!:P:P

thats odd that he's not there. maybe talk to him about it if it bugs you? just say that you worry when you dont know where he is and anything could happen (ie, car accident, etc) and you wouldnt know. ask him to leave you a note on the fridge or sumthin? i dont know?

lol! i blurt and then have to apologize [dysfunctional_faerie] 6/2/2005 5:46:55 AM

...a fair bit. It's more that I'm too blunt for my own good in a lot of things, and I just say it...not realizing how it comes out. I'm getting better there tho...I think and hope!:P

glad to hear ur well. take care, enjoy ur hols!:) [dysfunctional_faerie] 6/2/2005 5:48:03 AM

RYN: Aww, thanks, that's sweet! You're a cutie too, you know. ["miss cantina"] 6/2/2005 12:50:10 PM

i like the title

ryn: thanks! hug [Interpreter of Life] 6/2/2005 3:04:38 PM

thanks for my note! i no what u mean by wanting to tell customers to get lost! meh! i guess they pay our wages! [tink wannabe] 6/2/2005 3:11:56 PM

ryn: i work at paramounts kings dominion, its a theme park here in doswell virginia. i am supervisor at a indoor rollercoaster called the flight of fear!!

ttyl,

Jason [Stolen Sidewalk] 6/2/2005 9:14:18 PM


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