#TMIFiles: Chemo Infusion #7 in These Foolish Things

  • June 17, 2021, 2:36 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

Hello from the office. I haven’t written in a good long while and I finally have some things to report!

Yesterday was my chemotherapy infusion #7 and it was a rough one. Thankfully I’m more than halfway done with this shit, but going to the infusion center gets harder and harder, mentally and physically.

It’s harder on the body because we just keep BEATING HER UP every two weeks! It’s harder because the icing protocol is like a 2.5 hour torture chamber and I can’t relax at all while I have ice packs on hands, feet and I’m continually feeding myself ice chips for the whole time (with about 3 pee breaks because SO. MUCH. FLUID!). But if the icing will keep peripheral neuropathy at bay and I know it definitely helps with the cold sensitivity, then it’s sooo worth it. I even went to the store and got some mint dark chocolate low-fat ice cream yesterday and intend to eat a little at a time with no trouble with the cold. Fingers crossed. May try this tonight when I get home from work!

I haven’t told you about my weekend, have I?

On Saturday, I had another afternoon date with the Cyclist. And you know what? He just might be a keeper! He made all of the plans (even though he was a little bit overzealous with the possible dinner with the daughter - which did not happen, by the way), picked me up at my place and drove us to this cute little section of the city for lunch and a walk through the galleries and shops. I love how he likes to make plans and he can also take a little ribbing from me. He was kind of trying to show me around the area, pointing out different landmarks and things that I already know so well from living downtown for over 20 years, so I gave him a little, “you’re telling ME these things?” Which I know sounded soooo pretentious and condescending as soon as it came out of my mouth, but later we ended up making a good joke about it and even though he could have shot back with so many things (as so many dates have done before), he laughed it off. Love that.

I wore a strapless sundress that exposed my port scar (and the lump of my port), and he asked about it. It was as good a time as any to broach my cancer diagnosis and treatment. And he was not scared or repulsed or freaked out in any way, shape or form. In fact, he was quick to offer help in any way I need it, and I truly appreciated it and told him that I may take him up on it during my next infusion because they are getting harder and I feel something like being a little bit drunk by the time I’m done. He said he’s happy to drive me to and from appointments as he has some free time right now (he was laid off from his last job but the contract stated he’d be paid for the rest of the year). He now asks me questions about everything and wants to hear it all. He’s not afraid. I’m very impressed with his attitude towards all of this.

And he’s staying in constant contact with me. This is boyfriend stuff. He texts me little nuggets throughout the day and he likes to talk on the phone every day. I truly haven’t had any of this since my last real relationship.

I am cautiously optimistic. I want to see where this goes. I’m thrilled to have someone who’s interested in me - especially with where I am in my life right now. I’m so happy to have the Cyclist as something else that occupies my thoughts.

I was VERY fatigued when I got home from infusion yesterday so I took a good, long nap. I actually woke pretty refreshed, which is great, so I went to the grocery store and then picked up Martini from doggy daycare and then we went for our walk. It was shorter than normal because I was moving slow and still a bit tired. I did not get any boxes packed like I thought I might. I’m going to have to step up my packing game this weekend!

The move is rolling along. It’s mostly packing as I have SO MUCH STUFF. I’m not great at not being sentimental, so I look and contemplate and wonder how things might look in my new place. I know I want to start from a mostly blank slate, so I definitely need to get more cut-throat with the “baggage”. DO NOT need all that stuff in my life!!

Tomorrow is “Disco Day” so I will pull a WFH, even though I also have a doc appointment at my PCP in addition to DISCO. I will also likely be really fatigued like I was from last infusion. Fridays are when the steroids wear off and the fatigue gets even more intense. So…I don’t know how much packing (or work, for that matter) I’ll get done on Friday.

And then Saturday will roll around and I hope to get a good chunk done. We’ll see how it goes. I hope the Cyclist will ask for some of my time because he’s pretty good medicine!

And then Sunday…Father’s Day. I booked a table at a fancy steakhouse and we’re going to celebrate Father’s Day, my SIL’s birthday (no idea what to get her) AND my parents’ 58th Wedding Anniversary! So much going on on Sunday. I’m getting overwhelmed just thinking about it. UGHH.

Anyway, I better get going. Lunch is over and I missed all of yesterday (didn’t even check my emails all day!) and I have a lot of stuff to cover AND my boss scheduled a meeting from 3:30 - 5:00 ughhhhh. So. Better go for now.

Love you lots!

Last updated June 17, 2021

Parliament June 17, 2021

Hey babe, you should consider a storage unit. Then you don't have to make a snap decision on what to pitch. You move your essentials, and then as you're in your place and you think you want something from storage you go and get it. If it's still in storage six months later, maybe it's time for it to go? Just a thought. Love you. You look great and I'm really pulling for you!

Ginger Snap Parliament ⋅ June 17, 2021

Mayyybe. But I'm really trying to make this as simple as possible and I've had a storage unit before and it was a pain in my ass. So...I just need a good, swift kick in the pants.

Nash June 17, 2021

His reaction to the diagnosis was very impressive. A real gentleman.

Ginger Snap Nash ⋅ June 17, 2021

He really is. He has two grown daughters and I know he is very protective of the women in his life. But he also respects my independence. It seems to be a very good combo right now.

Elaine Benes June 17, 2021

I agree with Nash! Giant bonus points for him.

Complicated Disaster June 17, 2021

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Do I need to buy a hat?! xx

bobbi01 June 17, 2021

You are doing so well. I like that you have an extra cheer leader in your life. Moving sucks at the best of times, be kind to yourself.

colder June 17, 2021

I’m loving all the positivity, even as you are dragging things like Foxy and ports and treatments and other baggage through it!

Fred June 17, 2021

I am very encouraged by the Cyclist and not least because he seems a change of pace from some of the men you’ve been interested in in the past. I think the fact that he’s taking a break from work could mean he’s just what you need right now. I hope so!

Congrats on getting over this latest infusion and getting so far through your treatment!

Marg June 18, 2021

Oh this is lovely news re the Cyclist! All sounds so good. Could he maybe help you a bit with the packing at the weekend - especially as you have such a busy day lined up on Sunday - or would that feel too invasive?

Firebabe June 18, 2021

Very impressed with the Cyclist. It can be tough to work through the medical stuff, and not get overwhelmed by it, especially in the beginning of a relationship. Things seem to be going well for you, and I'm glad, because you deserve good things!

Jinn June 19, 2021

I am liking The Cyclist .:-) This in good news. Hugs for all the rest .

pandora June 21, 2021

Wow, the Cyclist sounds great, and I'm glad that he offered help via driving you! Re: downsizing your sentimental stuff, maybe get a really beautiful box and only bring what fits in that box, and take photos of everything else (like cards, etc, if you keep that kind of stuff)?

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