Happy Saturday evening. It’s approaching 9pm and I’m already tucked in bed, all my nightly routine stuff done (including face washing, moisturizing and meds).
I’m in the middle of recovery weekend and so far it’s been okay from the side effects aspect, except I’ll say that the fatigue has been much harder this time. In fact, the whole infusion was harder this time, from the moment they shoved that needle into my chest port on Wednesday morning until I was unplugged on Friday afternoon.
However, so far the nausea hasn’t been bad, but my appetite has been voracious. I’m assuming that’s the antipsychotic doing it’s thing. I hope I start even-ing out tomorrow (since I only take those meds for three nights, ending last night).
This cancer patient stuff is starting to get old, fast. I’m so happy I’m halfway done with treatment, but UGH…I’m so ready to be DONE done.
Friday was a little rough going, like I said. I did a WFH day (of the two days per month my company now allows for WFH - another story for another time) and led a meeting and wrote a recap and put out a few fires [until now when I opened my laptop and saw Rome burning in my work emails…ughhhh!].
But I also had to lie down mid-morning on Friday before the disconnect. I just felt like I was chemo-drunk this whole infusion. It kind of made me worried about my Friday evening date with The Cyclist - even after the DISCO.
But I rallied, showered and decided to put on a body-hugging giraffe print shift dress and my faux Valentino Rockstud stilettos. It felt really nice to dress to impress for dinner.
And I’m sooooo glad I did!
The Cyclist picked me up at my place - which is something I wouldn’t normally do for a second meeting, but since we’d been texting and talking on the phone all week I felt a trust that I haven’t felt in a long time.
He was prompt and impressed when I walked out the door and down the steps of my building. He said he felt underdressed, but he looked great in his dark denim (post-Covid dressy) and black woven shirt and dress loafers. He told me over and over that I looked beautiful and that made me feel absolutely amazing.
What was even BETTER, though, was the hostess’ reaction when we walked in together. I don’t know exactly why, but she made a BIG deal over my dress and how I looked INCREDIBLE and actually walked over to The Cyclist and gave him a high-five!! Hahaah! It was so funny and such a boost for my ego.
And the thing is, this was my first real indoor dinner date since Covid. It was really, really special - especially since I was nervous about telling The Cyclist about all of the stuff going on with me.
But the other thing is, dinner was so lovely and everything felt SO normal that there was no segue into talking about The Big C and my chemotherapy and what was going on from a health perspective. We talked about everything else under the sun!
There was one brief moment where we started to have a bit of a political discussion, but we both decided not to go there. It just didn’t feel like the right time.
And we even cut the evening short, him knowing that I have things going on that have me in bed early at night, so he drove me home and walked me to my door and gave me a couple of sweet smooches, but nothing sexy at all.
I think he’s being very careful with me. I think he has an inkling that something very serious is going on with me. I think he’s avoiding the subject for the time being because he wants to get to know the good stuff first. And I appreciate that.
I was happy to be home early and in bed by 9:30. Tomorrow The Cyclist leaves with his youngest daughter to go see his dad for a week or so.
Today I got to see a cousin who I haven’t seen in over 20 years. She and her husband are taking their youngest son on a college tour so this weekend they were traveling through my state to look at three or four schools.
They made it super easy for me and I appreciated it so much. They actually met me in the park and we had a food truck picnic and good discussions and happy talks and a great catch up. My cousin’s son (first cousin once removed - I had to look that up!) has red hair just like me and so we had to get a pic together for the ‘gram. He is such a great kid - so personable and friendly. We all went for one of my downtown walks after lunch and I really enjoyed our time together.
I suppose I could have been a better host and had them over to my place, but it is so torn up for the move. Nobody should be walking around in this space - not even me!
Tomorrow they will go to my parents’ place and see the rest of the fam. I opted out of that part because I don’t like the drive the two hours during recovery weekends. It’s not something anyone would want to do on a chemo hangover. No thank you.
So. It’s past bedtime now, but I want a little snack (see, voracious appetite). I am going to get some grapes and turn on the TV until I fall asleep.
Hope you’re having a weekend that’s at least half as exciting as mine!