So on Sunday I was going to kill myself. Sunday everything just crashed down on me and I couldnt take it anymore. I put my son down for a nap and walked into my bathroom locked the door and grabbed the large pill bottle of sleeping pills and sat down and placed them next to me. I was breathing heavy almost breaking down, I grabbed my phone and texted my wife that our child was safe in the room sleeping. I was going to leave it at that but something told me I should say bye to her, so I texted her my susicde note. I’m shaking with every word I type, my wife pounding on the door and trying to break it down, I get up and unlock the door, I sit back down knowing I felled and know this just will add up to being even more of a fuck up. I wife calms me down and unlocks my phone to call my Therpist, who get a mobile crisis unit to come out. After listening to me they did not want me to leave, they said I can go to the hospital or a stabilization unit which I choose so I wouldnt be locked up. I spent the night there talked to social workers to see what they can do. I will be entering an out paient program to see if the can handle the problem, if that doesnt work I may go to be admit to the 4 winds pysc center. I’m home my wife has taken all the pills under her control and I dont get to leave her side for a while.