Tuesday, April 22nd 2014 in I Need A New Job

Writers note: all names are changed to nicknames to protect myself... nobody is innocent here

Convict: I fixed the phone!
Me: Not that I doubt your abilities, but I don't think so
Convict: No I did, I've received calls through line 1
Me: Yeah it comes back every once in a while, but it'll go out again.
Convict: I fixed it by phoning it from the other phone [points to the break room]
Me: You can't phone it from that phone, it's the SAME PHONE LINE
Convict: Oh, I didn't mean that phone, I meant that phone [points to the alarm phone]
Me: That phone works just fine, it's on a separate phone line.
Convict: I know. If you put line 1 on hold, hit release, and then phone it from the Alarm phone it'll work.
Me: ...It isn't fixed. If the line goes out again, it obviously isn't fixed.
Convict: [points to break room] It's just hung on up on that phone's line.
Me: [Quickly losing my patience] It isn't HUNG UP on ANY line. People can still phone us, and it will still go through line 1; our phone doesn't alert us of the calls though.
Convict: Right. Because it's hung up on that phone. [points to the break room]
Me: THAT'S THE SAME PHONE LINE!!
Convict: Oh I meant the other phone.
Me: [trying hard not to explode] Look, it just isn't fixed okay?
Convict: [rolling her eyes] oookay [leaves office]
Me: I'm pretty sure my IQ just dropped a good 30 points.

...I need a new job.