Well it's over.... in General musings

We finally had a conversation on his way home yesterday, and he said he had to be honest with me...it just wasn't happening; he wasn't falling in love with me. And he had to tell me because he didn't want to lead me on.. Now we argued a bit...I tell him his concept of "falling in love" is childish infatuation - the whole can't breathe til you see the person again, etc....and that love, real love can't sustain that craziness all the time. He says he does love me, would do anything for me etc...I said yeah, except have an actual mature love relationship...He still expected me to go to his parent's grave tomorrow - thinks I'll drive up there (he said he'll sleep on the couch- just what I wanted to hear) tonight and go tomorrow. I told him I'd text him and let him know..but of course I am not doing that to myself. I feel like I have to leave my faux marriage, but that might still just be all the poison F fed me for the last three months...Might want to go stay with my stepmother for a little bit anyway though...need to clear my head.