Still on furlough. *Edit x 2. in Hello.

I had so many jobs I was going to do on lockdown and didn’t get any of them done! One of them was to finish knitting a blooming baby cardi for a baby that was born in August. I think she asked me to make it in June! I still haven’t finished it and as a consequence, I’ve really lost my knitting mojo. I should really just sit down and get the thing done.
This time next week I’ll be back at work I think. I’m sure it’s Wednesday. I’m rotaed in to open up, which feels like a big responsibility after we’ve been closed for a month! I say closed, the shop has been open for click and collect. But even that has been sporadic because we’re having some new equipment being installed (8 washbacks, meaning we can triple production, woohoo!) and they have to be craned into the building. But because the weather keeps being unpredictable, we keep having to schedule the entire site being closed, only for no work to be carried out. I suppose it’s quite lucky that we’re technically closed!
My eating has gone to pot as well. Before lockdown I was doing so well, sticking to my raw till 4 diet and the weight was slowly falling off. But because I didn’t really want to go shopping very much during lockdown, I’ve been eating whatever I can make out of ingredients we already have in and it’s not always the healthiest! I’ve put on about 10lb. My problem is I need a focus. I wanted to get the house and cardigan sorted so I can concentrate on being healthy. Ugh, I’m so pathetic, I need to sort myself out.
I know that the Sonja who does yoga, walks loads, meditates, doesn’t drink alcohol or caffeine and eats vegan is happy Sonja. Yet here I am, eating crap, drinking most evenings and lazing around the house. Where has my focus gone!? I keep making excuses. My latest one is to wait until after my birthday. We’ll see if that actually happens.
Edit: just seen in a Facebook group, perhaps this lockdown is affecting me more than I’m letting on. This self destruction thing is a common symptom of lockdown blues. Hm, how to fight the funk, I wonder?
Belle is having a mental health day today. She doesn’t always want to talk about it and this morning she messaged me from her bedroom to say she had a fuzzy head and cried when she put her uniform on. She’s going through a lot right now, one of her teachers is leaving, another one (her form teacher, who also teaches her maths and physics) is self isolating, plus she’s broken up with her boyfriend, which is sad. They didn’t fall out, it’s just that he works full time and she’s at college so they never saw each other.
Eleanor had a cry last night as well. She had homework to do and couldn’t find it on Firefly, and tech support were less than useless. I wrote her a note to give her teacher today, hopefully she feels a bit better once she’s there.
Belle turned 18 on Saturday. Crazy! Especially since I started blogging shortly before I got pregnant with her! We bought her a new laptop. She appreciates that it’s for Christmas as well. We had a bit of a party on Monday, John’s day off. I organised a Zoom call with Shellie and co, Rob and my parents. We all sang happy birthday to her and she blew out her candle on her cake. She decided on Chinese food. It’s mine and Eleanor’s birthdays next Monday, Eleanor turns 14. I’ve bought her a Totoro onesie and some slippers. John wanted to buy her a suit jacket (she’s obsessed with suits!) but she needs a warm coat more. I’ve found a nice duffel coat in the M&S sale and sent him the link, hopefully he’ll take the hint!
Edit: he told me to go ahead and order the coat. It was a toss up between the traditional duffel coat and a fluffy “teddy bear” type. I think the woollen one would be better at keeping out the wind and rain to be honest. I can finally get rid of the red coat she’s been wearing for years. Takes after her dad that one, won’t get rid of clothes until they’re falling off her back!

Last updated November 25, 2020