Today was a long day. I got up at 6 am, did my morning workout, and then I showered. I felt good so I decided to do an assignment for one of my classes before going to work.
But then I went to the kitchen to get breakfast and my mom started blaming me for a bunch of shit. She said that she’s tired of having me around and not being interested in her, like not paying enough attention to her. The problem though, and I have tried to explain to her, is that when I do ask her about how she’s doing, she always ends the conversation by saying what I do wrong and she finishes by blaming me. In a way, she always makes me feel bad and I’m tired of trying to help but getting yelled at when I do.
Being at work today actually brought me some relief from all of that stupid drama. Whenever I’m home, I feel like I can’t be myself because when I let myself go there is always something that she doesn’t like and I get yelled at. I’m seriously tired of this never-ending bullshit. And I can’t leave the house. I can’t move out because I don’t have the money. Some people would say “do it anyway, you’ll find money eventually”, but there are other things that keep me from doing it as well. Anyway, that is a story for another book :)
Tonight, I refilled my water bottle because I finished a full one at work.
Before going to bed I might do some stretches for my back because it’s killing me. And some meditation as well. Yesterday I did some meditation as well, and honestly, I felt pretty good mentally, but my body hurt. I have the worst back ever and my hips are not flexible at all, which means that when I sit with my legs crossed, I can’t do the traditional “meditation position” with my back straight. After a few minutes, my back hurts so bad that I have to “relax” and have a crouch-back. I know that I have to work on my sitting position a lot but the thing is that it hurts a lot when I do it for too long. If I had a genie who could give me three wishes, one of them would be that I never have any muscle pain in my entire body.
If you had three wishes from a genie, what would be the first thing you would ask?
Alrighty, have a good night (or a good day), kisses :*
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