Clean up in Songs

Every week seems like forever ago! I have taken on more cleaning shifts and my body is basically broken. I visited the farm again for the first time in a while. I’ve been out of it… not sure if I’m stressed, or inundated, or if my thyroid issues are rearing their head (I really hope not, since apparently I do not have coverage until October).

James moved out (maybe?) but left a lot in the fridge and didn’t return his key. Took the internet with him so I’m out of internet for the week, writing from my sister’s house.
With him gone I’m excited to stock the house with things. Like a couch. Like soup bowls. (He didn’t have a couch he took with him but he did have soup bowls).
I finally feel free to put things where I see fit, and even in the few hours I had to myself last night, it felt good to have free roam of the house without feeling like I was impeding on someone elses space. Not sure when he’s going to come again though, so can’t go totally nude just yet.

I’m thinking of taking isolation more seriously, but wondering exactly what that will look like since I work, volunteer, see family, see my boyfriend. Personally, am down to drop all of the above if it means I get to be alone in my house taking care and sewing and cooking and rearranging furniture every 5 minutes, but everyone keeps wanting my labor or company and I am obliged.

Right, Pat and I decided it’s ok to call eachother boyfriend/girlfriend for simplicity’s sake. He’s been in some sort of funk, which has given me a lot of space that I’m pretty grateful for, since I too, am feeling a little overwhelmed and agitated. I’m looking forward to getting my space the way I like it, and spending a lot of time chilling out. The general feel these days is gloomy and agitated. Stress headaches.

Monday I went to the farm and forgot to eat, and then tried to herd a giant pig and passed out. I think it’s only the second time I’ve ever experienced symptoms like that, and it was disorienting and concerning. Gonna try and take care, and do a little research to see if I can see a doctor before October.

Much love.