She Makes Me Happy Because She Is Happy in Days of My Destiny

The other thing I've been wanting to write about is just how HAPPY M is lately. It's like..... she finally gets that she really IS loved, exactly for who she is.

Because she is!

I don't know if I've written about any of it, but in the last 6 months I've been able to put words to things about her that I never could before. I've been seeing things differently and I've been able to define them and therefore come up with a strategy to work WITH particular things about her, or simply ACCEPT them, rather than work AGAINST them.

For example the biggest learning curve for me has been the realisation that M is the kind of person who really needs STRUCTURE. I don't. In fact I'm the opposite. Of course I need SOME structure in my life, but mostly I deal better with chaos kindly sprinkled around me. I don't like knowing what I'm going to do tomorrow. I don't like knowing what I'm going to do in two hours! I don't know what I will make for dinner tonight and honestly I don't CARE to care. But M....... she NEEDS to know. For me, peace comes from not knowing. Peace comes from the chaos. For her, peace comes from the knowing. Peace comes from the structure.

And so I've been able to really WORK with that. I've taken that piece of information and put it in with the rest of the puzzle and figured out ways to ensure that she DOES get the structure she needs. And honestly, she is SO MUCH HAPPIER for it. And as a result, so am I, so are we as parents. It's just amazing.

She does these funny little dances quite randomly. It's so heart-warming but hilarious to watch at the same time. Her confidence has soared. She shares so much more. She laughs way more. She finds the joy in things more. She tries more.

She's whole.

In short..... she's kind of become the kid I always thought I'd have to start off with.

Isn't that crazy? That I even had expectations?

I had no idea that I did...