Blue dreams in Adventures in paradise

  • May 25, 2020, 9:52 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

I was very depressed today. Not exactly sure why. I just wasn’t in a good mood. I went to the local newsagent to get a $5 scratchie (because way to fix depression Matt, gamble!) and the guy behind the counter just kept looking at his screen instead of serving me. I was thinking like, ‘Is he really busy? Oh I can wait…’ and after a while he noticed the 191cm guy fucking standing there waiting to be served and he was like, “I didn’t see you there. Call out next time!” and then burst into a fit of laughter. That just made me feel even more awkward. Can’t you read the room, dude? Maybe my outside face didn’t look like I wanted to fall into an endless pit.
I didn’t win, but it didn’t make me any more depressed, so that’s good. It got me out of the apartment for a few minutes. I had planned another home workout today to try and kill the blues but I couldn’t even bring myself to do that today! I knew that a sleep would make me feel better. It’s usually my go-to when I’m down. So I pretty much went back home right away and fell asleep before I knew it. I was probably only out for less than an hour. When I awoke, my door was open and my laptop was still open and paused on a video I was watching - for some reason I’d been watching the workroom entrances of each other the RuPaul’s Drag Race winners. How have there been 12 seasons of that? Man time flies.
Anyway, I felt a little bit better for the evening, like I knew I would. I finished watching Penn And Teller’s Fool Us and then watched a few Aussie documentaries on the ABC which are always interesting. At least that sense of dread had left me alone and stayed in slumberland.

Speaking of dreams, I forgot to write before that I had a sex dream about Bailey last night, so that was interesting that my mind decided to go there. I’d also fallen asleep IN my nightgown haha. I know it’s been getting cold lately, but that’s ridiculous. So maybe that’s all it took to bring on a dark presence for me this morning and this afternoon? Then again it threw an awesome candidate for a sex dream at me as well, so I win some I lose some. The ironic thing is I’ve hooked up with Bailey a few times in the past, but a long time ago since the last one. He was initially into me back when I was a twink (and he was an Asian twink so looked like a fetus) but I wasn’t into him, then the bastard went and made himself really hot so he piqued my interest, but by then he wasn’t into me lol. Story of my life - unrequited love! Ships in the night! Every so often (like once a year or so) I’ll get a random surprise Snapchat from him or something (and even more rarely, he’ll be horny) but I have no idea where he is or what he’s doing these days. Anyway, I’ll settle for that dream kthanksbye.


Mamie May 25, 2020

hopefully, you'll be able to do your workout tomorrow

TommyGnosis May 26, 2020

Just eat bread and desserts and get all fat and sassy. It's not like you to be all blue. Hang in there kiddo

crunchie May 31, 2020

The best kind of dreams! I hope it was only a down day and didn’t last :(

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