Dishing in These Foolish Things

…or, some things I’ve learned while in self-isolation:

• I like to do my dishes by hand rather than do a load in the dishwasher. If I do them by hand as soon as I have finished making my meal, they are DONE. No sitting in the sink because I have to unload the dishwasher before I can load it again and do more dishes. No unloading the dishwasher at all! Just seems to make life easier.

• I found out yesterday that two “friends” of mine have been playing an odd trick on me for years, telling me that they did not know one another. One of the friends just happens to be an ex-lover. The other, a girlfriend I sometimes dish with about my lovers (ex and otherwise). Yesterday, I was trying to do both of them a favor and thought it would be nice to connect them from a business standpoint. One asked for help and the other owns an essential business that I knew could help, so I thought I was being this super useful conduit. It’s funny how a crisis will bring out slips and I caught one of them in a slip. I played it off for the most part. I haven’t really confronted either one of them and I don’t know if I ever will. I just know now that they know each other and I will never dish to either one of them again.

• Apparently, I still got it. Does this make me a dish? The weather has been nothing short of stellar the last couple of days. I’ve been able to put on some summery dresses while walking the dog. They make me feel so pretty and alive - kind of the opposite of how I’ve been feeling the last couple of weeks. Anything to lift the mood, right? So as I was walking this afternoon, on my late-lunch dog walk again (seems to be a good time to get out and I rarely encounter another human being), a guy in a sleek, black Corvette rolls by and honks his horn. I was kinda like, do I know this person? He actually circled around and pulled into a parking garage and peeked out the other side, right as I was about to cross the entrance to the garage. He says hello and I do the same, thinking maybe I know this person? Upon closer inspection, I realize that I do NOT know him and that he’s actually trying to get to KNOW me??! He’s asking my name??? I mean, nice-looking dude and all, but I imagine if he’s trying to pick up a total stranger like that in the middle of a PANDEMIC, then something’s not right. I assume he’s rolling around town doing that with anyone who’s out and will pay attention. Maybe I’m not a dish after all. But I certainly won’t be a sitting duck. I waved him on by and wished him a good day.

• My dog has extended the olive bone and we are back to being besties. Just for that, I filled her dish with extra special treats today (turkey meatballs!). She actually came to play with me right after I wrote last night’s entry. My heart cracked wide open. I’m lucky I have a little soul with me in this apartment. I could very easily become horribly lonely during this time, but I’ve found that I’ve had not one moment of boredom since the whole Shelter In Place started. Do I miss human interaction? That’s debatable. I’ve had a lot of great video chats and things (I’m so happy my parents have figured out how to video chat! And I’ve got another virtual happy hour with my college girls tonight). Would love some human touch, but I’m feeling a tiny bit ambivalent about it right now. Sure, I like to joke about being horny and all that, but truth be told, I just want us all to be healthy and safe again.

Okay, enough dishing. I got other stuff to do!
GS