istanblue ⋅ 40 ⋅
When I was 21 I left everything behind and moved to NYC. A dream I had since I was a child. When I was 24 I fell in love and left my life in America to follow my heart to Istanbul. When I was 26 The love for a guy stopped. But my love for this country still goes strong. Now here I am 29 years old. I am still learning and discovering new things about myself.
Entries 32
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Disneyworld! in Life
So we try to go to America once a year. This year we went in summer so we are waiting for January 2020 when I have winter break again. Winter is cheaper for us for flights and hotels etc. NYC is ...
Where do we go? in Life
I almost never write but I have been reading for years! Since OD back in the day. Its my bedtime routine! I don’t know if anyone even follows me cause I post once or twice a year but still. Ever...
I never write and I don’t even know if anyone reads me but that’s ok :) I read daily and comment sometimes but never know what to write. I did wish I wrote more just to remember things but eh wha...
Almost 2 months in Life
I met my boyfriend almost 2 months ago. He is really incredible. He loves to suprise me at work with flowers or chocolates being delivered. Once for our 1 month anniversary. Once because I was ha...
slow down...nope! in Life
So here’s the story. After I broke up with my last boyfriend (a month or so ago) I started going on a lot of dates. I tried younger. Hotter. Older. Funnier. Taller. I wanted to see what I enjoye...
too soon. too fast. don't care. in Life
I know I am crazy when it comes to love sex and relationships. I get excited too quickly. I fall too fast. I know this about myself and it’s something that will probably never change. But when y...
holiday and things in Life
So I guess when in last wrote I was about to go to konya to visit my ex since he was lonely. I went and we had a lot of fun but Konya is so boring. We talked about us a few times and agreed to no...
So my 14 minis are in computer class right now. After this they have drama. Throughout the week they also have reading/writing, music, gym, science, dance, art, and chess. Yes. Chess. And yes the...
lazy weekend in Life
Last week was an easy one. Went to work Monday. Tuesday Wednesday and Thursday were snow days! Tuesday and Wednesday I didn’t do much. Stayed home. Cleaned. Relaxed. Was nice. Thursday my other t...
no complaints here in Life
I’ve been doing really well with this life outlook change. I’m not worrying or stressing. I’m being positive. I am happy. Sometimes old thoughts creep into my head but I am able to push them back...
Happy New Year everyone. Make this year count!
Where do I even start? The year is almost over. My relationship is over. Hopefully my depression is over. I ended my relationship with the guy who was perfect. Ok he wasn’t perfect. No one is. B...
oh yea Christmas in Life
So apparently Christmas is right around the corner. It’s hard to forget this when you live in a country that is well. Muslim. Regardless you do see Santa’s face everywhere and everything is on sa...
freshly inked in Life
Here’s the new tattoo! Can anyone guess the artist? As you can see I went for tattoo #4 today! This tattoo shop is literally next door to my friends house. She used to hang out with him all the...
Tonight has been kind of shitty. I’ve mentioned before that I don’t really have close friends here. I have the girls from work but we don’t hang out. I’m used to being in a relationship where I ...
Tonight sucked and that’s putting it lightly. Maybe I just cannot allow myself to be happy. Why can’t I just be happy?
Welcome December! in Life
My ex decided he no longer wishes to continue a friendship with me. I apparently have nothing good about myself and I am not a person he wants to be friends with. I let him tear into me for a few...
crashing down in Life
I feel guilt. So much of it. So much it just books over into tears and tension and I want to go back in time and fix it. My ex and I have been trying a friendship it was ok then bad then good th...
I spent most of my weekend laying on the sofa which wasn’t too bad. A bit lonely but tolerable. My plans with my ‘friends’ fell through for Sunday morning. I never really expected them to keep it...
My ex and I had a pretty intense conversation yesterday. He’s hurt I get it but he broke up with me. He wanted this to be over. I did my best to be nice to him because I knew he was hurting. Feel...
what is this? in Life
I’ve been living in Turkey for 4.5 years which on paper seems long but it has flown by! At 5 years I’m able to apply for citizenship which I am planning on doing because it’s much easier to work ...
the dream or reality? in Life
I sit across the table from him unable to stop smiling. I’ve known him a week and a half. This isn’t long enough to know someone. He moved my drink and reaches for my hand. His hands are warm and...
stay on the horse or fall off? in Life
I got back on the horse and like I said I had a date with a guy Tuesday and saw him again Saturday. We ended up spending Saturday and Sunday together because the attention was nice and I let him ...
getting back on the horse in Life
I am still feeling some sort of loss and emptiness. We don’t talk like we used to. (Hes busy or something) I stopped trying to contact him. Let him come to me. On Monday I woke up late. I spent ...
the break up in Life
Has anyone ever had a good break up? This one seems to my extra painful. Since being in Turkey I have had 3 boyfriends and 3 break ups. One was big. I moved here for him. We were engaged and he ...
