Bettie Page Sweats Cheap Vodka
Writer. Reader. Inadvertent cheater of death. Your lover with too much eyeliner on.
Maybe that's what we look for all our lives, the worst possible grief, to make us truly ourselves before we die. Louis-Ferdinand Céline
Entries 85
Page 2 of 4
That Old Story About Grandpa Cheesecake Titties in Dramedy
Facebook is kind of a cunt. It loves to remind me of people that no longer love me anymore or that are now good & dead. Sometimes it even reminds me of people that fell out of love with me be...
In Your Pursuit in The Alex Era
The day of the fight, I don’t know what possessed us. Any of us. Your father, you, me. You and I were supposed to be leaving, heading out to visit my friends in Fredonia where I went to school. Y...
The Unfortunate Cat Smuggling Incident of 2018 in Dramedy
Just returned from some late night smoking out on the front steps in a polka dot bathrobe and old pj’s. Listen, you can take the girl out of the white trash upbringing, but you can’t take the dys...
The Great Kenny Rogers Debacle of 1995 in Dramedy
Back in 2020, I woke up to the news that Kenny Rogers had passed. This news prompted me to look back in my OD archives for this ridiculously trying-hard-to-offend piece I wrote about a true event...
Pinkie Promise with the Devil in OD OG
We are all dressed in Sunday best the day you nearly run us over with your car. Your nicest clothes are dark olive Dockers like mechanics wear & a plaid button down shirt, but you still reek ...
For Sale: Baby Teeth, Never Brushed in Dramedy
so, there are teeth in my drawer at work. 2 teeny, rootless, jagged little baby teeth that previously resided in my daughter’s mouth. i have always struggled with any kind of holidays or traditio...
Tracklist for the Ruining of Young Girls' Lives in OD OG
I’ve been thinking about the day you shot the cow in the yard. I had a Fisher Price tape recorder as a child, all primary colors and thick, chunky plastic parts. It was my favorite toy when I was...
Man, That Cookie Monster Can Dance in Dramedy
Well, I’m re-entering the blogging world it would appear… What have I been doing? Procreating it would appear–as I have another child since the last entry. I swear, I do more than NOT write in th...
Bare Walls in The Alex Era
I’ve been thinking about that trip we took to Brooklyn…It was the last time you looked at me through the tunnel vision of a loving spyglass, drawing me close by focusing in on only me. After that...
THE REAL KICKER in The Alex Era
I remember him telling me a story about being at a bar in his 20s. He was there with his friend, Robert, whom later in life would only be referred to by the unfortunate name of El Dirtbag-o by Al...
Our Magpie Luck in The Alex Era
Mostly, I try not to let myself think about you… but under today’s snowstorm, a sky full of doves shedding their cold white feathers, I thought about you… I was thinking about that one Valentine’...
A Matter of Court Record in Dramedy
“Mom, who is my dad?” I am unprepared for the question my 8 year old lobs at me over dinner, as he swipes a milk moustache off his face with one swipe of his grubby hand. The answer seems so obvi...
Mais, Il Est Trop Tard Maintenant in The Alex Era
A letter I wrote to my estranged husband before he was killed.... A., Even after all this time, whenever I’m at a book sale, I still always look for the Fante. It’s my thing. Actually, it was yo...
All Honey, No Vinegar in The Alex Era
Yours is a haunting that I can’t seem to let go of. It was our anniversary on November 8th. Or would’ve been. I don’t know. I’m never sure if anniversaries continue to exist for widows of men who...
Necessary Fodder in OD OG
From time to time, I still think about the others I met in the hospitals and crisis centers, in the lowest points of our lives. And I wonder if they’re ok. I wonder if they beat the statistics of...
The Strange Tale of P. Mooney & the Impoverished Children in OD OG
The 80s education system loved a puppet. I don’t know why, but back then, the teachers often used puppets to teach us morals and anti-drug messages in our tiny, rural school. We had a whole progr...
The Persistence of Memory in The Alex Era
Your apartment is dressed in the shadows of twilight. Black sheets of it pulled down the walls, over the furniture. It hides the coffee cans of used syringes in the kitchen, the little metal weed...
Drinking with the Devil in OD OG
His clarion call comes at night to me from inside my dreams….Like a gust of wind blowing through an attic full of sheet covered objects. And even though it looks like shivering ghosts in here, I...
New Zoo Music Revue in Dramedy
These are the current tracks I’m spinning obsessively over here this month. Because I am low on words, and even lower on energy (thank you, depression)-I am sharing these songs instead of my tho...
VISITING THE GRAVE OF THE MAN WHO ABUSED ME in Poetry
Went to your grave to spit on it but the wind had other plans Before it could hit its granite target, it blew the gob back in my face After all the drinking, razor games, the parade of motley m...
INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS in Poetry
i. You push me up against the door, and fumble with your pants Even though the heat is unmerciful in the room, my teeth chatter in fear I hate that this is what they’ve chosen to do instead of b...
February Flashback in The Alex Era
Facebook is kind of a cunt. It loves to remind me of people that no longer love me anymore or that are now good & dead. Sometimes it even reminds me of people that fell out of love with me b...
AUTOCORRECT IN LOVE in Poetry
I use the word love so much in our texts that my phone has started to slip the word into places that it doesn’t belong, but that are similarly spelled. Did you used to love there? She loves in ...
Water the Tree in OD OG
Once I had a sister. Actually 2. And a brother. We were born spaced apart…my older sister is nearly 4 years older than me, I’m nearly 5 years older than my younger sister, who is nearly 5 year...
Variations on a Dream in OD OG
The first thing I’m aware of in the dark is the smell of soap—my mother’s one indulgence has always been taking long baths… I can’t see her in the lightlessness of her room, but I can picture he...
