Haliern
Entries 18
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Ode to the Ex (totally non-bitter version) in Petty Peeves
You’re really not as eloquent, Artistic, Bright or skilled, As the person that you see in you, You’ll never be fulfilled. You’ll keep lying as your soul is dying, Day by wretched day, But your ...
Alone with family? No. Alone, with family. in Miscellany
Today’s proving as awkward as I thought it would. Since she broke up with me we’ve done nothing but argue (viciously, too) and now we’re having to spend Christmas together because we’re still un...
Foolishness. in Miscellany
It was so much easier to feel angry than to feel hurt.
Unreserved in Petty Peeves
Bags are not people. Bus seats are meant for people. You paid for one seat.
Lie Berries in Petty Peeves
Please learn how to speak. It is pronounced “library”. You’re saying it wrong.
The Wrong Way To Do Toothpaste in Petty Peeves
Squeezed from the middle. Not the way gods intended. The end should be first.
Time to Forget in Petty Peeves
Unsure of the time. A quick glance at the wristwatch. Didn’t take it in.
Milking It in Petty Peeves
Cornflakes in a bowl, Covered in rancid half-cheese. Smell test forgotten.
Copy-Paste Survey Time in Miscellany
1.Whats your name? I’m between names at the moment, sadly. 2.How old are you? Old enough to know better. Young enough to do it anyway. 3.Greatest birthday gift you ever got? Freedom from my wombc...
Hidden Marvels in Petty Peeves
No more Punisher. Luke Cage and Iron fist… Gone. Netflix seems empty.
Missing The Point in Petty Peeves
Insufficient friction in my fingers was the cause, Despite my grip the pencil slipped And fell onto the floor. I cried and howled and wept and wailed, And clutched the air in vain, But downwards ...
Ketchup Labours in Petty Peeves
Tap tap tap, tap tap. Taptaptap. Taptap. Tap. Tap. Tap tap tap tap splat.
Lament of the Bus Traveller in Petty Peeves
Ticket prices rise. Burning petrol and money. Cramming people in. Twenty pence more, now! Mad, furious passengers! Seething in silence.
Boiler on the Blink in Petty Peeves
Howling with wild rage! Bitter tears for British Gas! Room’s a bit chilly.
Ode to Shrinkflation in Petty Peeves
It’s not because my hands have grown, Or I’m remembering wrong. Much more to pay, much less to own! Where has the chocolate gone? It used to be about the size Of my entire palm! They’ve shrunk th...
On Keeping A Cool Head in Petty Peeves
Soft pillows too warm, Turned them over, but no joy. No face refreshment.
Which switch is which? in Petty Peeves
Two switches for hall, One downstairs and one upstairs, Toggled off when on.
Crying While I Wipe in Petty Peeves
Over, not under! Soft sheets of paper, hung wrong! Toilet trip ruined.
