Entries 717

Page 2 of 29

OK, now I should finally get caught up. As I said yesterday afternoon…Writing has been hard since I couldn’t see well, and speech-to-text was having trouble understanding me with my nose packed ...

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I feel like I’m never going to feel human again and get back to myself! I’m so backed up in my writing, and even after just a couple of days, my coloring, VR, and scented candles seem like long-...

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I was giddy with relief when I saw the text message saying to show up at St. Joseph’s the following morning, with the only disappointment being that it was three hours later. It would have been ...

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On the way to Rhonda’s now. It’s so stupid. She’s only going to do the same thing the pre-op nurse just did. It’s a little hard to see now, as it’s not even seven and the sun hasn’t risen above ...

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Had another nightmarish sleep. Woke up struggling to breathe a few hours after crashing, and I’m seriously starting to wonder if the CPAP isn’t actually exacerbating the turbinate issues. AI say...

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Tom’s tentative plan is not to renew his license when it expires in 2030. He’s eagerly awaiting the day he’s not able to drive because he hates driving so much, lol. He also insists that an Uber...

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As exhausted as I am, I want to write while things are fresh in my mind. Slept shitty, and part of it was my own dumb fault because I overdid the estrogen again. Because of this, I was up for fu...

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On the way to the ENT’s office to sign the consent forms. Appointments, appointments, appointments…it never ends! Not as tired as yesterday, but sleep was still a little fraggy. Stress, I guess...

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Written before lunchtime: Heading for my pre-op appointment, and I’m horribly tired. I knew I would be. The further away or longer my appointments are, the more tired I am. Fucking nose woke me ...

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So Toni’s in Florida now, and she didn’t tell me she was coming down. I don’t know how close she is to us, but that doesn’t matter, as I’m not sure she and Melanie are really invested in friends...

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I am so frustrated now that I literally want to scream! Life looks so bleak. I am simply not looking forward to the rest of my life, but I’m forced to live it for his sake. Can’t go until he doe...

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Started making Penana stories visible that are six months or older because that way they don’t get as much attention and therefore not as many spam comments. So fucking pissed at myself! The ho...

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Yesterday turned out to be a shitty day. First, I get a call from the woman who handles the finances regarding my upcoming surgery, and she tells me it’s going to be a little over $400. So just ...

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Still with the fragmented sleep, but last night was the last night taking 3.5 mg of melatonin. Tonight it will be 5 mg. If that’s not enough, I’ll go to 10. If that’s still not enough, then obvi...

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Yesterday was an absolutely shitty day. I had trouble breathing through my nose, which disrupted my sleep and left me exhausted and also in a shitty mood. So Tom looked at more detailed info tha...

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I’ve decided that this is it. If surgery doesn’t improve my sleep and restore my energy, I’m gone. Just gone. So, so fucking sick of hopelessly suffering and struggling to figure out and fix wha...

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Slept horribly. My sleep was fragmented and broken up. It finally hit me that part of that was my fault. For some reason, I got it in my mind that the melatonin gummies I currently have were hal...

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A woman named Nancy, who lives here, requested to add me for some reason. I’m trying to think if she’s the one who stopped and said hello one time recently when I was pulling in the trash bin, b...

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Now that I’m done editing old stories, I think I figured out where to go with the rest of my blackmail story—the one where Natasha lives in Florida and goes overseas to meet Christiane and Nane ...

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Another hot chocolate kind of night. Another week or so and our winter is over, and we’ll be back in the 70s. At least it’s not going to drop well into the 30s tonight. It’s going to be around 4...

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This is the second day in a row I’ve been shorted an hour or so of sleep. Yesterday, my mask slipped, and today it was my nose. Otherwise, I slept well between half a clonazepam and melatonin. T...

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Just a quick entry before Tom gets back. He’s gone to drop off my Cologuard kit and then pick us up some Domino’s for a treat. Besides, he’s kind of out of food until Walmart delivers tomorrow. ...

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The weather has been historically cold. It hasn’t been this cold in decades, at least from what I’m hearing. I don’t know if it’s an exaggeration or not, but what started off as seemingly the wa...

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Back again the next day and on the way to the surgeon. I like that it’s a woman, but not that she’s all the way down in Tampa. Wish we had a gas car on appointment days! Or at least a hybrid. It...

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Heading for the ENT now. Not quite as tired, but bad enough. Every night, there’s a long break in my sleep due to either stress or breathing issues, and it’s slowly but surely killing me, especi...

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