What is your name? Adam. Or Ado. Or Ad. Or Aaaaaaaaa.
What is your age? I’m 32. Physically. Mentally I switch between 8; 21; and 87.
Single, Married, Hooking up? I think I count it as “Hooking up”. I’ll ask Katie next time I see her.
Favourite Food? Oh so many. Let’s say chinese. I have been reliably informed I make an awesome Thai Green Curry though.
Dream Date? I covered this in an old OD article. Basically it’s a day spent with someone. Hopefully ends in a night spent with someone. I believe a hotel featured. Possibly a beach and an art gallery. Or an art gallery on a beach.
What are your top 3 favourite THINGS? Things as in possessions? Gosh, trying to narrow it down to 3 is going to be difficult. Let’s see. For number 3 it’d have to be one of my Doctor Who things. I guess my sonic screwdriver that is an actual screwdriver. It’s been useful and cool. For number 2 it’d be my computer. It’s not the most powerful on the best but it does what I want it to do. Must thing of something decent for number one. I think I’m going to go with my phone. Damn, that’s not decent at all. However, in terms of sheer usage it’s the thing that gets the most. It’s got my audio books on it; my emails; apps; pdfs; books; internet. It’s generally just really useful. I think my phone. Man, that’s really sad. I need more personal stuff.
What food would you rather starve than eat? Can’t think of a darn thing that I’d rather starve then eat. The lass I nicked this off put “cows testicles” but if it came to a choice between that and starving to death I’d eat them. Perhaps I should reword this to “go hungry”. Ok, in that case, tinned tuna. Yeeeeuch.
If you could have any job what would it be? I actually enjoy my job. However, as always, if I could be anything I’d be an actor. I could be the next Doctor!
Do you like animals? Pretty broad statement. In general, yes. The only animal I really HATE are wasps. Horrible things. My old dog Merlot once bit one out of mid-air for me. I rewarded him with Guinness. Seemed a fair deal to me.
Which are your favourites? Oh, loads. Dogs; cats; red racoons; ferrets; rats; the list goes on.
What is your favourite thing about the opposite sex? “I find the most sensual part of a woman is the boobies” - Kif, Futurama. Seriously though. You know that thing where they smile at you first thing in the morning and you go weak at the knees? I quite like that.
Least favourite thing about opposite sex? The list would be long. I suppose it would have to be the passive-aggressive ones and the self deprecating bullshit. Or possibly, even worse, the ones who pretend to be self deprecating because they’re fishing for compliments when all they’d ever have to do is ask.
Note for everyone out there, men and women alike, it is better to say “Tell me you think I’m beautiful” then “I hate my ass”.
If you could win something other than the lottery what would it be? Two Lotteries! Oh, is that cheating. Seriously, I’d just like the money thanks. I suppose some game show where you could win a house. That’d be cool.
You win the lottery- what are the first 3 things you buy yourself? 1. A house with a basement, the door to which can be disguised as a bookshelf. 2. 6 weeks in a health spa. 3. A holiday to show off my new healthy form.
Would you ever get a Brazilian Wax? Ooooooo, no.
What is your favorite perfume? I admit to not having one. A well washed woman usually smells fantastic. Soap, then?
What is your favorite cologne? See previous. I generally just try to keep clean. I had “Diesel” once. It smelled quite nice but I wouldn’t buy it for myself.
What is your favorite smell that is not a perfume/cologne? pine forests.
If you could remove anyone from your life- who would it be and why? No-one really. Anyone I want to cut lose I already did.
What is the one thing you wish you could go back and change? I would have never started smoking. Other than that it’s been a pretty good life so far.
When did you feel like you "made it"? Most recently? I finished developing my first bash script. I’m pretty impressed with myself given that I’m entirely self taught. Or perhaps you were looking for something larger? Tough, the bash script is what you’re getting.
What is your biggest accomplishment, other then college education? Definitely the bash script. Oh, ok. I suppose it’s putting up with me and reminding myself every day that I’m a worthwhile person.
Do you like your job? Yep. I get to meet people; travel; and educate and help. It’s pretty good. Just wish it paid more.
What magazine would most likely appear on your coffee table? Probably either “White Dwarf”, courtesy of Shep or “Xbox 360” courtesy of Dan. I don’t read magazines.
More important: nice television set or nice furniture? I’m actually going to astound people and say furniture. If you have a decent tv but are as uncomfortable as since you’re not going to enjoy it. But if you have decent furniture you can still relax on it and read a book.
More important: money or looks? Looks will only get you so far. Or do you mean in a prospective partner? In general life - money. If trying to pull - probably looks at first.
More important: good face or good body? Face.
Would you rather die alone or die married to someone you never really loved? Alone. I’d certainly rather risk dying alone then being with someone who doesn’t get me.
Would you rather read a magazine or a book? As previously stated I don’t read magazines really. So definitely book.
Would you rather celebrate Halloween or Thanksgiving? Well, since I’m not American I don’t celebrate Thanksgiving. So Halloween.
Do you prefer blondes or brunettes? No preference in hair colour. It’s the girl under it I’m interested in. I don’t care if you’re bald.
Banana Republic or J. Crew? Not sure if these are bands or bourbons.
What do you wish someone would do for you? Wake me up and tell me we’re going on an adventure and they’ve already made me a coffee and packed a picnic.
Heathers or Mean Girls? Heathers. Of course.
Ohio State or Michigan? Who cares? Which one has the lower homelessness rate? Apparently Ohio. There you go then. Go Ohio State!
Would you rather date a model or an artist? I don’t mind as long as they’re a good person. What they do for a living should not be the basis of a relationship.
The O.C. or Gossip Girl? Stop asking about shows I’ve never watched!
California or Florida? Oh gods, I can’t be bothered to do another joke for this one. Neither.
Hot or Cold? I’d rather be hot for the most part but I think there’s a tipping point. I’d certainly rather freeze to death then burn.
What do you think about UGGS? I can only assume this is a misspelling “eggs” by someone who wants to shout about them. Nope, apparently it’s some sort of fluff lined shoe thing. I think that most of them look ridiculous but if it keeps your feet warm you got for it.
Would you really rather go naked then wear fur? Depends how cold I am. And whether I’d killed the animal myself or not. If I can take down a bear in unarmed combat I deserve to wear its skin as a trophy. If it beat me it would have no compunction about chowing down would it?
Do you actually like country music? Sure but you can easily have too much.
Who is more whack- Lindsey or Britney? More Whack? Hello quiz, the 80’s ghetto just called, could they have their word back please? I think they’re both very troubled people.
Would you rather have J lo's Booty or Christina’s pipes? What, on a plate? I’m not a girl so I think either of these would be very silly on me.
Do you think accents are hot? Sure. My voice, particularly, is like an orgasm in chocolate.
Did you hear about the girl who lost her legs on a roller coaster? Yes, by the time she finished the ride she was too short to get on it! HEY HO! Thank you, I’ll be here all week. What? You don’t get it. Oh, sorry. Most rides have minimum height restrictions you see and…. oh you.
What would you do if that had been you? Bleed to death probably.
Would you rather be deaf or blind? Why is this one every quiz ever? Deaf.
Would you rather win the love lottery or the real lottery? What’s the Love lottery? Ewwwwwww.
Would you rather be the cause of a car accident or be the one who got hit? The one who got hit. Don’t think I’d like the guilt.
Would you rather be the beauty or the geek? I am a beautiful geek.
Aldo or Steve Madden? More words that make NO sense to me. Madden is a football thing right? Can’t be bothered to research this. Let’s just say Madden because he has a first name. Good on you Steve.
Are diamonds really a girls best friend? What a stupid question. No, the guy who bought you the diamonds is your best friend. Or girl. Or whoever.
What is a deal breaker on a first date? Racism. Passive aggressive. Violence. Many are the ways to screw up a first date.
Would you tell someone if they stunk? I think I might tell them quietly that they needed to take a shower.
Vacation spot: It’s been so long since I had a proper vacation that I just don’t know. Prague is still on the list.
Movie at home or at theatre? Both have their benefits but I think I appreciate the cinema experience more.
Who pays for the first date? Depends what you’re up to. If it’s a fun-fair the bloke should definitely pay. Not sure why. Just seems wrong asking a lass to pay for the fun-fair.
Do you kiss on the first date? Generally no. This brings up a valid point that when Katie and I went for our first date I thought she was going to kiss me at the end and I didn’t move to kiss her. Hmmmm. I should really scope out the kissing potential here, I may be missing a trick.
Do you prefer: heels or flats? Flats. I look awesome in heels, don’t get me wrong.
How do you break up with someone? Honestly would be my preference. Oh, and painlessly if possible.
Does your family embarrass you? Of course but I embarrass them too. It’s all just part of being a family.
Do you embarrass yourself? Not really. I probably should be embarrassed but I generally seem to get by without that reaction.
How many mirrors do you have in your home? 4, I think.
Do you like anyone right now? “Like” huh? Sure. Coach or Dooney and Burke? OH FOR CHRISTS SAKE QUIZ! I’M BRITISH! God help me if these people turn out to be British now. HA! Turns out they’re hand bags. I’m calling that a win.
What intimidates you? Wasps. Public bathrooms. Wasps in public bathrooms.
Do you actually like diet pop? Diet coke, yes. Diet pepsi, no. Pepsi Max, yes.
Do you have a small bladder? Relative to whose? I need to go to the loo sometimes, yes. Stupid question. Ok, this quiz is starting to annoy me. How much is left? Christ it goes on forever.
What is the most embarrassing thing you have ever done? Not known what a Coach, Dooney or Bourke is. Where can I put my face?
Which famous person do you relate to most? None of them.
Have you ever had a secret admirer? Yep.
If yes- what did they do? Sent me flowers. Turned out to be Becky years later.
When did you feel the most special in your life? I am special, just not always in a good way.
When did you feel the handsomest/prettiest? 20. I thought I was gorgeous. Of course, I was, wish helped.
What moment do you think is going to be a great one in your life? How would I know. Probably something twee like the first Christmas after I eventually settle down with one lass.
What moment do you wish you could relive again and again in your life? None, life’s too short.
Rather die of cancer so u had a chance to say bye or quick with no warning? I’d rather have the cancer, say “bye”, then go jump off something.
Facebook or Myspace? I don’t have a Myspace so I guess Facebook.
What do you do alone you would never do in front of someone? Masturbate furiously. Nope, I’ve done that in front of someone before. I have no idea.
What does your mother nag you about? Nothing really.
Do you REALLY care what people think about you? I’m interested in what people think and some peoples opinion I respect enough to give a flying fuck.
Are you okay with who you turned out to be? Sure, I’m fantastic.
Have you ever felt so much pain you thought you were going to faint? Yep, got my knee sewn back together without anaesthetic.
When was the last time your heart hurt? Month or so ago.
Are you jealous of any of your friends? Nah.
What Kind of car do you wish you had? A camper van.
What kind of car do you drive? 2004 Ford Focus.
Do you have insurance? Have to to legally drive the car.
What is something that is bad but feels so good? Dunno, heroin?
What makes a person unattractive? Years of being a fuck-tars.
You say you aren't going to do it again- do you mean it? Depends what it is.
How many times do you say "I will start tomorrow"? All the time.
What do you wish people knew about you? Anything I want people to know, they do.
Why are you happy? Spring is here.
Why are you sad? This quiz is making me sad.
What is sexier: a bikini or a cocktail dress? Cocktail dress.
Tell everyone who you are in one word: Complicated.
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