Michelle in Fragments of Life

The first time I spotted Michelle was from a distance. Like most detectives, she worked in a large room that was full of desks, some sectioned off by partitions.

I liked what I saw right away. There was just something about her that drew me to her and I wondered if her personality matched her good looks or if she was a stuck up bitch like Angela first came off as and like many in law enforcement often do. Many people who choose to work in law enforcement tend to be on the aggressive side because they believe that law enforcement gives them that sense of control and power they often crave, and in their minds, a means of acting out that aggression that they can get away with.

But Michelle wasn’t anything like Angela started off to be. She was so sweet and so kind. She was a very caring, compassionate person who really strived to seek justice for victims in the fairest way possible. I never so much as heard a single rumor about her being involved in any kind of corruption and I knew she wouldn’t support anyone that was, whether they were one of her own or not. She was very by the book but not without compassion for those who deserved it.

I learned that Michelle grew up in New Jersey and then her family moved to Texas before most of it settled in NorCal. She had very loving parents and two sisters, both older than her. They live in Sacramento. One was a psychotherapist in another was a pediatrician.

Michelle ended up in San Francisco when she met a woman up in Sacramento that she had a long-term relationship with. Her ex was from San Francisco and she eventually moved down with her until they broke up a few years before we met.

Every time I would see Michelle I would find myself not so much becoming shy but definitely very self-aware in ways I normally wasn’t. Suddenly I found myself wondering if my outfit looked okay, if my hair looked okay, if I had any noticeable blemishes on my face, etc. I would choose my words more carefully than usual and get all giddy in her presence… The usual things people do when they have a crush on someone.

After seeing her several times, I was beginning to worry that the feeling wasn’t mutual (even though I sensed it was) and that she would never ask me out. But then one day she said, “Come on, walk with me,” as she was heading toward the elevators at lunchtime while I was explaining a certain thing I had researched for her in the records department. I don’t remember what it was but it had to do with the Wayback room where evidence from cold cases was often stored, but to stay on topic, we went to a nearby sandwich shop and she treated me to lunch. It was the first time we talked for more than just a few minutes and I thoroughly enjoyed it, too.

I almost felt a bit, well, I don’t know if disappointed would be the right word, but I guess I kind of was when she would ask me anything about myself because I felt I just didn’t have anything interesting enough to answer with. But she seemed to accept my answers and even like some of them, LOL.

The more we talked, the more I liked her. We went back to work all too soon with me hoping she wasn’t just being nice that day with extra time to spare and that our get-togethers would become a regular habit.

And soon they would. I just didn’t expect things to kick off in the way they did but as they say, life isn’t usually what we plan it.