Some days everything conspires against your sleep. Husband woke me when he went to bed. Then the cats woke me on and off. Whenever I woke, it was hard to go back because my stomach was in knots. There was loose flour in the air in the baking isle at Walmart. I didn’t notice until I licked my lips. I wish they wouldn’t pack it in those useless paper bags.
I groggily ignored two phone calls from my sister (and then two texts followed two more calls, but the phone was silenced by then.) It takes that many calls to ask me if I want to go to the store. She says it’s because she knows I don’t drive and can’t get to places, but really, she just hates doing things alone. I get around fine on my own. She’ll call my husband if it’s actually something important.
When we both lived at home, she’d make me go to the store with her every time she went. She’d say I didn’t have to, but whenever I refused, she’d lay into me. She’d often threaten to break my laptop which was the one thing that kept me sane in that house. It was easier to just go along with things then, even if I’d do it differently now.
Husband is trying to get his sleep schedule back to days before work starts. We were supposed to go to Target today, but it’ll be too late by the time he gets up. It’ll storm all day tomorrow. I’m tired of disappointments, even these little, inconsequential ones.
He’s working Christmas now. The company is shifting everyone’s days sometime in November. The last few years, my family has celebrated it after the actual holiday. But now that Sister isn’t working retail anymore and Mom has the next day off, the 25th has become a thing. Family is the last place I want to be for Christmas and now I’ll have to face it alone. I’m going to tell Mom on her next day off. She’s the one easiest to work with. So much stress over two days, two months away.
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