Update: 2 in update: 1

Yesterday I made probably the healthiest decision for myself in a while. I decided to do a break with my boyfriend. It’s been a while since I was able to bask in the sun of care. The radiancy seeping through the pores of my skin. Feeling the nakedness of truth slapping me in the face. I needed this. Today was the first time I felt care-free in a while. In the younger days, for some, you could remember running, playing, jumping. fun. Before having to grow up. Before having to be stressed. The feeling of the wind hugging, wrapping around you. guiding you. That’s what today was. The exploration. hanging onto the branches of youth. He’s not a bad person. He tries really hard. Sometimes, it just pointless. Sometimes it those days. Days where everything is pointless. Relationships, education, life. You can’t stop it. It happens. It’s frowned upon. Shamed. Lungs filling with water. Brain filled with lethal ideas. Arms chained down. Mouth stitch shut. Eyes.. closed. Refusing to open. Everyday we run down the hill, hill of depression. Hill of mortality. Hill of death. Some people are blessed, to be ignorant of the pain. They are free. Light weighted. Shackle-less. I felt blessed today. I felt what they Felt. Pure happiness. Something so uncommon. Something so good. It’s like a beautiful fawn. Delicate. Rare. Easily gone.