Hi. I used to be Dew on Opendiary. I am uploading what I worte there to here, hopefully this will be a goo new home
This was written on 9/13/1999 Hello All. God, the holidays are such a bad period of time to start a serious diet. (Do you think God will hear that and cancel some holidays?).
I live in fear of the holidays. I plan ahead how I’m going to fast the whole day and eat only salad during the meal, and it never works. My mom starts feeding us in the morning, and it’s like the holiday - you feel like you’re on vacation, and the will-power dissapears. And who has the energy to fight with my mom on a holiday?
And the the actual meal comes up. By then I know that It’s worthless. The conversation is so boring - my hot shot cousin talks about law and economics and everyone seems thrilled. My other cousin tells bad jokes and my second cousin keeps whispering in my ear to get married before it’s too late, while her husbAnd is whispering in my brother’s ear to have a lot of sex before it’s too late. Those too deserve each other (but what did WE do?)
What can you do under these conditions but eat? And then the next day it was my brother’s birthday and we went to a resteraunt. I was pouting all the way, and no-one in my family could understand why. I thought of asking not to go, but you know - it’s my brother’s birthday. i ended uop eating only two things - but they were clam chowder and apple pie...
I actually feared the restraunt - i know it’s dumb. lately happy things like resteraunts and holidays give me nightmares, when it’s actually ME that’s the problem
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