I feel like some background information is necessary to help make this situation with my wife more clear. Our dominant and submissive relationship started slowly a few years after the beginning of our relationship, but it continued to grow until it turned into a proper lifestyle for us, not just bedroom behavior.
I think every couple that practices some version of this lifestyle puts their own spin on it, and in our case we have something like a parent/child thing going on. Definitely not in an underage sex fantasy kind of way, I want to make that very clear. But it’s more in the type of authority we have decided that she has over me. She’s less of the classical dominatrix type and more like a strict parent.
It began somewhat accidentally. I think that’s probably how it happens with most people. You play around with different things and some stick and some don’t. After spanking me for doing something she disapproved of, she decided she hadn’t punished me enough so she put me in a “time out,” and then send me to bed early. The next morning I told her how much it had excited me for her to give me a bedtime. She almost immediately announced that from that day forward I needed to be in bed by 10:00 every night.
At that point in our lives we had a habit of staying up until about midnight, so I was a little surprised. “Even on weekends?” I asked.
She thought about it and said, “On weekends I want you in bed by 8:00.” Then after a pause she added, “And since you questioned me about it, it will be 9:00 on weekdays now.”
This conversation took place in 2002. More than 16 years later, I still have these bedtimes. In all those years, I’ve only stayed up passed 9:00 on a handful of occasions. And there have been long stretches of time when I’m being punished when those bedtimes have been even earlier.
I’ve told her over the years how much I appreciate her being strict and unforgiving with her rules, and like in any good dom/sub relationship she learns from my feedback like that. Not only has she continued to enforce these bedtimes even when we’ve been on vacation, she’t not allowed me to see a single NYE midnight, not allowed me to stay up late on my birthday, and has forced me to turn off movies and never see the ending if it was even getting close to bedtime.
So we don’t have a normal relationship, and me snooping through her drawers is itself probably enough to be me in trouble.
This entry really only explains the tip of the iceberg when it comes to our relationship, but I couldn’t adequately describe it all in one entry.
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