I’ve never told anyone this but I had an imaginary friend.
Only it wasn’t when I was that young. I created him in high school. Weird, I know.
But I did it on purpose.
At first it was kind of an inside joke between myself and I, that one day I would go crazy and start imagining people.
You see during those years I had really bad depression and isolated myself to the point where I got really, really lonely.
That loneliness manifested itself into my imaginary friend who I called…well I’ll just call him ‘El’ for now since the name I originally called him by is kinda embarrassing.
He showed up whenever I was at my worst, and he was the kindest, most caring part of me. The part that still felt hope, the part that still wanted to live.
He was the positive to every negative thought that filled my head during those days. Always talking me out of the bad stuff… And if I’m gonna be completely honest, creating him saved me in so many ways.
Even when my parents stopped believing in me, he still did. And I guess that means that I still believed in me, even if everyone else didn’t.
He’s gone now. It’s been a couple years since then. I haven’t been feeling lonely or depressed in a while, so slowly he disappeared. He wasn’t real, but the impact he had on my life was. And for that I’ll always be grateful for. He was my secret imaginary friend, who I guess was worth going a little crazy for.
:)
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