I’m really sorry to hear about your husband :( I think in time you will get used to being alone. And some parts of me enjoy it! I do enjoy the peace and quiet, but it’s too quiet, the little things I want the most, sharing your day with someone, little exciting things that happen I want to share them, I just want someone to understand me and know me as me. Living alone has its perks. But as for your situation I can imagine how alien it seems after sharing everything with someone for so long, I would love to reach out and hug you back!! I feel so alone sometimes I feel like the world is passing by me, and I’m just stuck here alone. I have faith that I will meet Someone i hang on to that a lot.