Years passed in The Thoughts in my Head

Years have passed
The pain is still so real.
I thought by now I would have forgotten
Forgotten the way it felt to have your arms around me as I slept,
Forgotten what it felt like to kiss you,
Forgotten what your voice sounded like,
Forgotten the hurt.

Unfortunately thats not my story.
There are nights I still cry myself to sleep.
There are days I can’t get dressed
Let alone get out of bed.

I look at my phone constantly,
Hoping your name will pop up.
I’m tempted to message you.
Those are the nights,
The nights I need alcohol to sleep.
The nights I need some random person next to me,
The nights I feel the most alone.

Time,
It’s suppose to heal
But here I am still broken.
There are times I wonder if I will always be broken.
Will my perception of love always been shattered?

I have to put the fake face on,
No one can know I still struggle.
No one can know I still love him.
No one can know how much I love liquor,
the numbness it makes me feel.
No one can know I still cry.
No one can know....

Years....
wasted…
What happened to the healing?

—Southern Belle—

Last updated January 11, 2019