Getting older in The View from the Terrace

We had a great time at our friend Donald’s 80th birthday party last night. It was held in an activity centre in Craswall up in the Black Mountains. I haven’t driven up there for years, it’s a beautiful spot with far reaching views over Herefordshire and Monmouthshire.

The party was great. Food was served at 7pm; there was a hog roast with salads. I am vegetarian and wasn’t keen on the hog roast part. If Cat, who is vegan, had been there she would probably have walked out saying she couldn’t eat in a room with a dead body in it! I just ate the salads and Hubby enjoyed the pork. Then there was entertainment by a local male voice choir with a very modern repertoire. Among other songs they performed The Lion Sleeps Tonight with two members at the back wearing lion masks, very funny. Afterwards we were served desert. This time I was very happy with banoffee pie followed by eclairs. I know I have to watch the calories but this was a party! Then we all had a sing song including solos by Donald who is a lovely singer, and afterwards we all got up to do the Hokey Cokey.

Lots of our friends from the folk club were there. One of them told me her daughter was at the village primary school with Cat and what was Cat doing nowadays? I always find that question difficult. Cat has never worked because of her autism but she hadn’t been diagnosed when she was at school. I panicked and started explaining about Cat’s problems. To be honest I think she was more interested in telling me all about her daughter Sophie so I should have just said Cat was living in Cardiff with her partner who works at the university.

We were surprised to meet Tony’s boss there, and even more surprised to discover that he is Donald’s son. Tony works for Black Mountain Quarries, a local stone firm. Apparently the original quarry was started on Donald’s farm a few years before Tony went to work there. Tony’s boss, Adrian, and his wife renovated his grandfather’s original farm cottage and that was the subject of a Grand Designs programme. I have found it on You Tube and will watch it when I get a moment.

I really enjoyed the evening. I even managed to drive home with my new glasses. The problems I have been having with night driving are a lot easier with anti reflective lenses.

Unfortunately I woke with another migraine early this morning, perhaps I overdid the sweet things. After taking two kinds of meds it started to ease and I went downstairs to get some breakfast. Hubby was nowhere to be found. I knew that meant he was probably at the top of the back garden in his own little world. Our back garden slopes up the hill to a field. It’s about 90 feet long and very overgrown, a lot of the top two thirds is covered with trees. There is also an access road behind our house between the houses and the gardens, so when Hubby is up there he is totally unable to hear me call, which, I often feel, is why he likes to spend time there, although he denies this adamantly.

Today I remembered that we needed some items from the village shop which closes at lunchtime on Sundays so I tried calling him. Of course, he didn’t hear. I went back upstairs with my bowl of cerial and cup of tea and got out my laptop to do some of my online course. About an hour later I got up again. One of the items we needed was coffee and I wanted a cup so I called him again - no reply. Then I heard an ominous sound from the dining room which I was right in thinking was the cat being sick on the carpet. This was just too much with the way I was feeling. Bending down is getting more difficult with my knees and with the after affects of a migraine even harder so I called Hubby again. This time he actually heard me and arrived a few minutes later through the back door chatting to the other cat as though life was good, which I suppose for him it was, I’m afraid I landed into him. He knows I often wake up ill, he knew that we needed stuff from the shop, he knows he can’t hear me when he is at the top of the garden so why was he up there so long? ‘I was watering my plants, I lost track of time.’ was the reply. It’s so annoying, if he would only take his phone with him and remember to turn it on there wouldn’t be a problem. A part of me thinks he doesn’t forget, he wants to be where I can’t reach him, and that is unkind as I only call him when I really need him. I told him he didn’t care about me and he said, ‘I can’t care, it’s part of my condition.’ What else is there to say to that?

In my last entry I was talking about the experience of getting older. Early yesterday morning a very funny age related thing happened. I got up to go to the bathroom in the early hours. I wasn’t wearing my glasses and I looked through the landing window and in the half light I thought I saw Macy, our black and white cat, lying in the wet grass outside of the kitchen window. He is 11 and I thought I had better go down and let him in. I opened the back door and called, no Macy. In the end I gave up and went back to bed. This morning I looked through the window, in full daylight now and wearing my glasses I saw a black plant pot with a bit of white paper beside it lying on the grass just where I had thought Macy was. Macy was probably in the neighbours cosy living room all night!

Here is Macy looking very angry, perhaps he found out I thought he looked like a plant pot.