Moving on in 2016 is almost over

I just found out my ex is engaged and is having a baby with his crazy girlfriend. He will make an amazing father and i cant stop thinking about him. About 12 years ago when we were together, he gave me his dad’s bible. His dad passed away about 3 years before we got together. I still have it. Its all i have left of him. I have been thinking about wrapping it up and giving it back to him, so he can give it to his son when he gets older. I think something with that type of meaning is meant to be kept in the family. The problem is i don’t know how to give it to him. I know where his mom lives and i can drop it there, but that would be an awkward situation. I haven’t talked to him since i told him that i couldn’t just be friends with him. There will always be apart of me that knows we are supposed to be together. We broke up and then reconnected 3 years after and then we were best friends for 7 years. My marriage was falling apart and i would go to him to talk about it. He was always there for me. He always knew what to say. I’m not a person who talks about my issues and true feelings to anyone. I could always tell him everything without even thinking about it. Anyways, when i told him how i really felt, there was this look that crossed his face. It was a look that crushed me, pity. I have never felt more rejected or embarrassed. I knew then i had to let go of it all; him, the past we shared, and the future i so desperately wanted. I dont even know if he remembers he gave it to me, but i think its time to give it back. Close the final door, say the final goodbye.