I was sifting through all the bull shit you told me I my mind.
“We’ll get through this.”
“We’ll figure this out.”
“I’m here for you.”
“You can trust me.”
Oh, the list goes. I wish I could just get over you. This baby is the only reason I think I’m still hung up. The resentment keeps building. I wasn’t lying when I told you I’d never forgive you for leaving me like this. Every mile stone that passes, I resent you. Every doctors appointment you don’t even ask about, I hate you more. Forcing me to deal with this alone while you go on with life.. Ohhh.
I hate you.
The doctors appointment today went well. I’ve only gained 4 pounds this month. I’m 17weeks. I finally heard baby’s heartbeat. That was beautiful. I find out the gender on the 95th. With my oldest turning 9 tomorrow, I’m getting a little more excited to have a baby again.. Not thoroughly am I convinced this is such a great idea yet though lol.
More later.
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