I’ve fallen behind with updates here and I feel like there are several things bouncing around in my brain that I want to share.
About two weeks ago, a strange man knocked on our door and served Megan with divorce papers. Despite her many faults, Megan has always been the emotional rock in my life and it was painful to see her crying so hysterically that afternoon. I cried along with her because her pain was so strong that it impacted me.
She wasn’t herself for many days after that. She’d leave the house in the early morning and come back in the afternoon all sweaty. I’d ask her what she’d been up to and she’d just say she took a long run. I’d ask her how it was and she’d say, “Fine, I guess,” and that would often be the only time we’d communicate all day.
I’ve very disturbed about my weight gain. I’m embarrassed to write that I weigh 165 now. I’ve transitioned from feeling like I’ve put on a few pounds to really feeling like I’m fat. I weighed 120 less than 2 years ago, and I don’t think there have been any real changes to my lifestyle, so I’m not sure why I suddenly am getting so big. I’ve had the really unpleasant experience of buying new clothes because I gained weight, and then continuing to gain weight until I no longer even fit in the new clothes.
I’ve even gone up a bra size and it’s embarrassing to know that my boobs are bigger just because I’m fat.
I got a Valentine’s Day card in the mail from Rachel that said, “Just wanted to remind you that I love you!” and I felt bad that I didn’t send her anything. I’ll have to remember for next year.
I haven’t had a period yet in 2016, and I’m not completely sure why. I’m certain I’m not pregnant. I’m not sure if I should be concerned or grateful.
I want to write an entry in my religion book about our plans to get married in the temple in November. I might not do it today, but I’ll write it soon.
Loading comments...