Thank God I’ve never taken up Russian Roulette as a hobby…I would really suck at it.
Three days after Halloween, I come to find I am totally, absolutely, undeniably knocked up.
Naturally, I make this discovery about 6 minutes before I have to leave for work. I didn’t really think the damn pee test would be positive. So I drove there shaking like a leaf and with an entirely new perspective on my screaming labor patients.
If there was a pie chart for the emotions I have, it would contain like 99240 colors. Initially, I felt terror. I am creating a person. This is monumental. This is astronomical. How can I be prepared to bring forth a new life and raise it to be a good person with solid morals and someone to make a difference in the world? Yep. Terror.
Next, pure joy. I am creating a person *with the person I love.* We are going to create a family and share in a new journey together. It’s one I know he’s been eager to start and I am so excited to have a being that is the construct of both of us and our love. Our DNA, splitting and rejoining to make someone totally new.
Followed shortly by sadness. That’s it. The part of my life where I am totally free and untethered is over. I will never again be able to just take off a few days and disappear with Joe on a vacation. Or have us come stumbling in drunk after a night together without worrying if the baby is fed, changed, safe, etc.
Bringing the circle back round to terror. What kind of mother am I going to be if these are the thoughts running through my head?? lol
The hormones are raging. The boobs are sore as hell. The nausea is pretty tolerable, thank GOD. But I am 10 weeks and 4 days pregnant, and I am going to have a baby. And if all goes well (fingers crossed) I’m due 2 days before my birthday. July 15th.
Anyone have a pickle?
Loading comments...