I lied to you... in Perfectly Imperfect Me

I told you that I was mad at you, and you suggested that I was just frustrated and I agreed… but I lied. I’m not just frustrated, I’m angry.
This is a new feeling for me in the last couple of weeks, but I’m so mad that my stomach is in knots, my chest hurts, and I’m getting headaches from gritting my teeth.
I love you so much, and you make me so mad! And now you’re talking about getting another dog, a long term commitment, and it’s like a fucking knife to my heart.
She’s never going to leave you. No matter how unhappy you both are, it’s comfortable and safe and she has her bitch to do everything around the house for her, so there’s no reason to leave.
And the same goes for you - it’s familiar and comfortable to you, and change is scary (you know, that change you told me I need to do to better myself), and you’re content to leave things the way they are because you know I’ll always be there.
Meanwhile, all I keep thinking is what a shitty person I must be. You tell me you love me and want me, but it’s not enough. You don’t love me or want me enough to do anything about it. Do you know how painful it is when you feel like you aren’t good enough for the person you love? Why am I not good enough to take a chance on???
This is me, Eugene. You know me. You know my faults and my flaws and the things that make me wonderful in your eyes. Apparently the bad outweighs the good, because you’re still there and I’m still here, alone. What else do you want from me???