Taking the days slowly in The dotted line

It's been a heavier few weeks.

First there was Mother's Day, which, through the kindness and thoughtfulness of those around me, we navigated gently.

Then unavoidable home pressures meant my brother had to drop his care shift, so we needed to jiggle the calendar and I found myself spending another week with my Dad halfway through my planned at-home-time.

That is mostly joyous as my Dad can be a sweetheart. His capabilities fluctuate though and this week I found him less able than he had been on my last visit. He'd had a bad fall the week before and it'd shook him up and left him with some aches, so that will have contributed. He's forgotten how to fully make a cup of tea. It's our fault, we stopped practicing as it was easier to just make it for him. I know we can relearn it though, it just takes repetition and positive encouragement. As with my Mum's illness, we just have to keep shifting what normal now is. Thankfully at a much slower pace this time.

The week was also made heavier by it being the final week with my long standing work mates. I found the time pretty uncomfortable, trying to balance my sadness and anxiety, with my empathy for my team mates, whilst still presenting a go-getting front for my bosses. It was very conflicting. The all-company meeting was the hardest, I found it best to just not say anything at all.

This Monday was super quiet. The first day without.. everyone. I had one work mate that I'd chat to a lot throughout the day and it was deafeningly quiet without them. They kindly popped on yesterday for a little catch up.. they're now waiting to hear on a call-back from their first interview, and I have high hopes!

I'm now looking forward to indulging in the long weekend at a music festival, writing lots of new memories, enjoying the atmosphere and hearing lots of great bands. It will be a great way to disconnect from the day to day and reset my brain.