Soo much for feeling great Tuesday, October 26, 2004 in scarlet_dragon

Welll...right now I feel like crap and it's like 9:30 at nite I have a feeling it's going to be a looong nite like no sleep b/c I'll be nervous for tomorrow.I just have this feeling that I'm going to get that call at 8:15 so I guess I should just prepare myself as though I'm going to get called....but I still can't help it I worry about everything....and as for me getting my $10,000 back from my dad that's still up in the air he hasn't offically sold the house.....GRRR I want my money damn it and I guess he called my sister to talk to her about him getting a job in Florida and I guess that's what he wants to go to lunch tomorrow to discuss with me.....you know what dad I'll walk you to the freakin plane I don't care if you go or not it's no big deal to me.....do whatever the hell you want b/c that's what you did for 18 years of my life so why should I care now????O well I know he's just looking for a reason to not go...that and I know he'll want to put the whole well there's no one to take care of ur grandma and grandpa and you know what I'm not their babysitter so I'm 19 it's not my responsibility to go take care of them my dad's sister lives like 15 mins from them and is too lazy to get off her ass so if that's all the more she cares about her parents then why should I make it my problem???GRRRR it's fucking never ending in my life I can't have just one moment to myself I thought things were beginning to look up but HAHAHAH yea right I don't think they ever do in my life......F*the world right now I'm fed up!