Joys of Business Travel in Open Diary 2001-2018 (Pre-Prosebox)

Back from Europe. It always seems so strange when I travel back from these trips that I woke in Spain in the morning and arrived home in the Great Midwest in the evening. Nice to get those seven hours back, but it messes with my internal clock a bit.

Too many people on board this time in so many ways. But I learned some things about myself. I lack patience. I think that’s why I like to be alone so much of the time. I have somehow always placed myself in situations (work and otherwise) where I can go off by myself and do my own thing. It was impossible on this trip, and it was certainly a challenge. I’d like to delve into this deeper, and I’m sure I will in future entries. I just wanted to note it here because it seemed to be a big theme for me on this trip.

The trip was one big posture-fest. There were more people involved in the Brussels meetings and I’ve never seen more jockeying for position in my life. Combine that with my boss turning into a gigantic dick and top it off with alcohol, and you have a lethal combination. I was so angry one night after a big dinner in Antwerp. Boss went bar hopping with “the boys”, and I went with them from bar to bar just so that I could argue a point. I disguised it as best I could with the fact that I was something of a tour guide for them (they’d never been to Antwerp), but I wanted the last word, dammit. And I was willing to stay up all night to get it. Stupid, I know. I’ll probably get fired for it down the road, but whatever.

I wasted a lot of time being angry on this trip. Damn shame.

[Fun side note: I also spent some time just being plain stupid, too. I knew I was going to run into Jeff (from my old job) in London. Troublemaker. We have strange chemistry together. I know it will never lead to anything more than sloppy, drunken kisses. But I think we have this funny way of relieving each other’s stresses for a while. After another gigantic dinner, I met up with Jeff, and he took me to some odd little places. I actually had a great time letting off some steam. And we got sloshy together. Ended up in my hotel room drinking sparkling water out of each other’s belly buttons. Strange, I know. But fun and fairly innocent. There was potential for it to go further, but honestly, I don’t think either one of us will ever really want that.]

Good thing we all went our separate ways after the two-day stint in our Brussels offices. Boss and the boys went to Turkey, some teams went to Hong Kong, one designer went to Amsterdam, and Chelle and I went to Barcelona.

When we landed at the airport in Barcelona, Chelle said, “I’m glad it’s just you and me on this leg of the trip. I like you better by yourself. Sometimes when we’re in that group I look at you and think to myself…do I know her?”

Been thinking about that a lot lately. I suppose I do get caught up in that shit. Obviously. You’ve read about it recently. The politics thing really hard for me to do. It doesn’t come naturally for me, and I think I simply try too hard.

So I was very sensitive to that statement during the last two days of the trip. A couple of vendors met with us while we were in Barca and took us out to dinner. I really made an effort to try to settle down and relax. I think I did okay. I think Chelle even had fun with me (I know that sounds kind of pathetic, but I’m serious).

On Friday, we had a somewhat relaxed last day in Barcelona. Really, just had about a ½ day worth of work to do, so Chelle and I decided to get massages at the spa in the hotel. It was a great way to end the trip, and a bit of a bonding thing for us.

Yesterday was spent traveling all day. It was torturous on many levels (too many to get into here), and I was glad to have Chelle there with me to commiserate. Our last leg was from Chicago to my city in the Great Midwest, and we were practically thrilled to step on that plane. We didn’t have seats next to each other, but the plane wasn’t full and I had a seat next to me. I know it sounds queer, but it really made me happy that she came up to my row and asked if she could sit with me before the plane took off.

I’m glad to be back. Work’s gonna suck the next few weeks, but I really hope to be able to do something about some of the issues. I have a lot to think about and a lot to work on.

I’m exhausted.