Back in the USA. Almost dead, but I made it. I’d like to say that I didn’t take any more Ambien on this trip, but I took one on the plane ride home because I was desperate for some sleep. This time, I didn’t add the champagne, so I think [hope] I didn’t re-join the Mile High Club or talk my seatmate’s ear off, telling him about OD, all my lovers, and how the carpet matches the drapes (which is basically what I did on the way over).
Man, still pretty freaked about the Chambien thing (mixing alcohol and Ambien). I found this article about people who pop an Ambien and have a drink or two and then sleepwalk, sleeptalk, sleepdrive, sleep-binge-eat, have sleep-sex…man, it’s freaky. Because I absolutely lost 6 1/2 hours on that plane and don’t remember a thing.
But I’m on the ground again, thankfully. And I took two days off of work to regain my sanity after this last trip. And would you believe I’m getting sick? Aaaahhgghh! I knew that was gonna happen. Damn you, funny old London, for spitting rain then shining sun then spitting rain again! Damn you, drink-happy Big Boss, for making me match you drink for drink! I prayed for strength in the last entry, and I needed it. By noon we were getting our drink on. By 2:00, we were toast. By 6:00 we were at it again before dinner. NOT KIDDING ONE BIT!
No wonder I’m writing this from my death bed!
I’m actually writing this entry from my parents’ place. I needed to come get my baby kitty (who’s been here for almost a month while I traveled the globe) and do my disgusting laundry (still don’t have washer/dryer at my place!), and to get a home-cooked meal and a good night’s sleep (glorious).
Tomorrow, it’s back to the real world. But what IS the “Real World”, really? It’s weird. I can’t decide if I like my Travel World or my Grounded World better. They both have their benefits and their down sides. I think what’s hardest for me is the transition in between. Because there’s always a transition. The hardest thing is when there’s not enough transition time in between, like March has been. April won’t be as bad. At least I’ll have a full two weeks between week-long trips. Funny, this world I’ve made.
And as far as relationships go, I think I’ve decided it’s more Out of Sight, Out of Mind than it is Heart Grows Fonder. Which makes me more than a little sad. And more than a lot worried that it’s never gonna happen.
I made it back to town late Sunday afternoon, so excited to see AtH on Sunday night. But wouldn’t you know…when I called him at nearly 8:00 to find out what was going on, he’d forgotten and had people over at his place for dinner. Um. Ow.
In fact, I told him that I had been really looking forward to seeing [band we’d talked about several times], and he was like, “Well, I just can’t do it tonight. But YOU should go…”
And I was all, “Yeah, I’m going to go.” But really, I didn’t want to go without him.
But. Within five minutes he called me back, telling me that his dinner company had talked about going too…and that I should come over and have dinner and we’d all go together. Which, well. I don’t know if I really believe him (about everybody REALLY wanting to go to this show), but…it was super sweet of everyone to accomodate me. His friends are so amazing and friendly and seem not to care that I’m this random person who lives across the hall and has just started hanging out from time to time.
And here’s where it gets even more tangly. As we were walking into the venue, he’s all hand-holdy. Which is awesome!! But still very confusing to me. And he’s continuously by my side even though he’s still hosting his guests. And…I don’t know if he did this on purpose to completely freak me out, but at one point he said something like, “aren’t I a great boyf…I mean, neighbor?”
HUHHHH??? I’m completely thrown.
And absolutely smitten.
Yeah. So much so that I finally had the courage to tell New York Guy that I’m not comfortable about him coming out for a little fling-a-ding-ding. NYG was very understanding and sweet about the whole thing. In fact, he told me that he was personally disappointed but also happy that I am pursuing happiness. Yeah, we’ll see if that happens.
Now if I could only find it in me to finally get the closure I need with LDL. Then I would be utterly open to a new experience with a completely clean slate. How refreshing that sounds to me right now.
Well, I better close for now. I need to get the cat home and run a million more errands and check in at the office and (wish upon wish) get a nap in…
Loading comments...