(though they’re technically not a band since they don’t play instrumuents)
The youngest member must be blonde.
Point out the obvious while you’re singing.(ex. pointing at your watch when you say time, or eyes when you say see and so on and so on.)
You must have at least 6 huge black bodyguards.
Everyone in the group must have a ridiculous cheesy nick name that the others call him ALL the time.
Talk about your sex lives. We want details!!
No half shirts!!! I cannot stress this enough.
There must be at least 1 sex crazed member who humps everything in site.
You must say you like girls for their personalities, not for their looks.(Even though we all know that’s bull crap)
You must say you’re not a millionare.(even though you own corvettes and mercedes and islands in the pacific)
You must have a trademark dance.
Always say that it’s not about the money.(even though we all know it is)
2 of you should be inseperable.
Do not wear overalls. EVER!!!(…unless you’re Howard)
2 of you should be related in some way.(although it isn’t necessary)
Norway is in Sweden.
You must dress like dorks in vests and other assorted gay clothing in photo shoots during your early days. (this does not help your career, but it gives us webmasters something to make fun of later.)
All members but one must have their ears pierced.
Dedicate a song to the fans.
Pelvic thrust are always nice.
Do not write any songs until your 3rd or 4th album.(in America that would be the 2nd album, since us damn Americans don’t get those and we have to hitchhike to Europe and pay 30 bucks for it)
Must have been managed/created/screw-over by at least one of the following – Lou Pearlman, Maurice Starr, Johnny Wright.
Once again thanks go to No Pants Attached (address in last entry).
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