Sometimes I wonder why I am like this. I am different. Many people tell me it's normal. Everyone has violent thoughts, they tell me. But they aren't this graphic for everyone. No one has them every second of every day. You want to kill your boss, I picture the random boy in my Econ class being skinned because I think he's pretty. I'm not normal. I'm not upset that I have these thoughts. They make me feel good. I'm upset that no one in their right mind would think I'm normal. If I told anyone else in my life about what I truly think sometimes, I'd get weird looks. I'd get people scooching away. They aren't just violent. They are sexual too, but I'll talk about that another day.
I just want to find someone like me. The silent Clyde to my Bonnie. We can both suffer in peace. Together.
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