2) Chortle
Chortle is one of two assistants in my work group. She's the oldest person in the work group. Early 60's I want to say. I'm bad with ages, so I guess there's a chance that she might be in her late 50's. Either way, she's no spring chicken, which in and of itself is not a bad thing, but unfortunately, she has a reputation in the office as being habitually lazy and being very quick to avoid doing any work. If you approach her for anything that might require some thought, effort, or movement, she will suddenly be too busy and/or have something already going on and she will be unable to help you. The bottom line is that she will consistently find a way to avoid doing work. As far as I'm concerned, someone in an assistant-type of position should not be lazy, but here we are.
She joined the work group well after Gurney did and it did not take long for him to reel her in. She was sipping the Kool-Aid pretty quickly and she still is. Chortle helps Gurney and two of the other women in the work group regularly. The third woman is an assistant herself, but I'll delve into her a bit later.
Chortle, from what I've seen, doesn't do what I would consider to be particularly good work, at least, nothing that I would ever feel comfortable turning in. In knowing this, I do not ask her for any help with whatever I'm working on. I wouldn't want her name on anything that I'm turning in and I've always been of the mindset that I'd rather that any work I do be done correctly. I have always tended to work independently anyway, even before the department started hiring assistants, and at least for me, Chortle's services or assistance will never be needed. Being that I don't have faith in any of the assistants in the entire office, there's no reason why I should have any faith in the skills and abilities of the two assistants in my work group either, Chortle especially.
As far as I'm concerned, Chortle is nothing special. She's just kind of there. I don't talk to her, not even so much as tell her "good morning", and I'm perfectly content with keeping my distance from her. If "placeholder" happened to be a person, Chortle would be it.
You could put anything in the chair in her cubicle (a plant, a mannequin, crushed cereal, or even a severed foot) and you'd get the same output of work as you'd get with Chortle sitting there.
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