room in book 1

i went a while without cleaning anything. I just couldn't bring myself to do it for a chunk of time, which inevitably made me feel very lazy and useless. i was more focused on other things, and i forgot about focusing on myself. after a bit, i became overstimulated in my comfort zone, so i forced myself to clean everything up and wash all my clothes. i also cleaned my bathroom, too. i can breathe now, without cursing myself every other thought because i stopped my tidy habits and lounged around in pig slop. I'm back to my regular routine now, fixing my bed and cleaning every morning. it felt like the dirtiness was consuming me,,