Today was a lot of fun in class. Each of us took turns standing in front of the class while our classmates called out "nice" words. The word "tease" was mentioned for all of us as a joke that I had started. It was good lighthearted and uplifting fun.
Our afternoon class only had five of us in it. We had to make a "cd cover" that describes us. I made mine into a heart with the words "Kim's Jams" at the top. Then I bulleted bands that I would have on there. Prince, Queen, Maroon 5, Cold Play, Monsters of Men, Katy Perry... Then I ran out of room. :-)
Yesterday, I stayed home with Bean cause she had a fever. We watched movies all day. Then I had a meeting with my counselor. When I got home I made ham and potato soup from scratch.
Bean's costume came in yesterday. She's going to be a zombie cheerleader. A 9 year old kid that's obsessed with zombie's and loves the Walking Dead. Yes, we do let her watch it because she knows the difference between acting and real. Movies and TV are acting. The news is real.
LT's costume is due in tomorrow. He's going as an executioner. It was a last minute decision. As a back up plan he'll wear hubby's flight suit from his military days.
So, the letter...he never did bring it up. I waited until we were in bed before I brought it up. I brought it up then because the kids were in bed and I felt like we needed to talk. He was pissed that I didn't let him go to sleep, but instead "increased his blood pressure". Whatever. He denies everything. Now it's up to me to believe him or not. He was pissed about my issues with his phone and said he had nothing to hide that because of his job he wanted a shred of privacy. I told him he shouldn't have to lock his phone....he's not allowed to take it into work, instead it's for personal use only. So, I turned the table and asked "so if I ask you to unlock your phone so I can look at it you wouldn't have a problem with it"? I think that put him on the spot so he answered "no, I wouldn't have a problem with it." This gives him ample time to get rid of anything he doesn't want me to see, because I won't ask in front of the kids. He's also pissed that I refer to her as his mistress. I told him you say you were just friends, but you CHOSE to keep your "friendship" a secret for 6 effing months. That's not a friendship, that's a relationship, therefore I won't use her name, so mistress it is.
We have unresolved issues, but I think my marriage is worth fighting for. I realize now that I can't do it by myself. He has to want it to and I'm not getting that from him.
He's pissed that I'm still a stay home mom. Say I go back to work...one of the kids is sick, I'm the one that would stay home with them. If the school calls, I'm the one that would have to leave work to handle whatever happened. How many times leaving work before I got fired? Then add in my health issues. I have a deformed foot from a car accident in my teens...standing for long periods of time is out of the question. I also have a limited education. All of which I know are excuses, but truth be told it's been 13 years since I've been in the work force and I'm scared to death.
Hope you all have a great evening.
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