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My How Things Change (Or, Hi Prosebox!) in This Is Now

  • Oct. 31, 2013, 12:31 a.m.
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So.

It's been a while!

Last time I updated over there, it was a few months after my daughter was born. She is now 20 months old, 20 months worth of sweetness and light, and joy and devastation. You know that really cliche saying about a child being your heart walking around outside your body? Completely true. Part of me is never at ease.

Truthfully, I thought there was going to be this giant shift in my life where I "felt like a mom."

It hasn't happened! I mean.. my life has changed in all the appropriate ways. I never get time to myself, I am always tripping over toys (and NOT TOYS, because why would a child want to play with toys when they can just stick their head in a plastic bag or destroy your laptop?), I've been to the mall ONCE in the last two years, and I was sleep deprived for months on end. But although she is my everything, I still feel exactly like me, but with a kid.

I think my expectation that I would devolve into a sweatpants-wearing mini-me-obsessed zombie has a lot to do with how some people seem to lose themselves completely in parenthood. I have a friend who had a kid and for ONE AND A HALF YEARS (seriously, I checked) she never ONCE posted anything on Facebook that wasn't directly related to her child. I swore I wouldn't be that person, and I haven't been. But I think that has a lot to do with just... who I am.

Motherhood has changed my perspective in so many ways. There is not a second goes by that I am not acutely aware of that piece of my heart that is actively running around, jumping off of things, and SASSING me. But also... I'm still just Katy. I didn't expect that.

Is that weird?



Taking after her mom, clearly:

 photo IMG_2488.jpg



I really, really love this kid:

 photo IMG_3004.jpg


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