WEIGHTY THOUGHTS in Adventures From Prison

I’m a big man. Since I was a kid I always topped the height/weight charts. For most of my life I’ve struggled to stay in the range between 250 and 300 pounds. Being six feet tall with a body that tends to distribute the fat all over instead of just in my gut that keeps me from being too blubby. After I was put on house arrest I stopped caring. I knew I was facing at least a decade behind bars, so I ate anything I damn well pleased. During the intake exam, I balanced the scale at 343 pounds. I was depressed and could barely lift up my leg to take off my socks. Over the next month I was kept in isolation while I detoxed from 5 years of Xanax. Let me tell you, that is not a fun experience. I lost 20 pounds before I ever set foot on the compound. Once I got adjusted to my environment I started to exercise and put on a bit of muscle, never really losing weight beyond 5 or 10 pounds.
A few months ago, I read on our electronic bulletin board that the Rec department was sponsoring a Weight Loss Challenge. I guess I was feeling sadistic because I signed up immediately. With my divorce moving forward, after 4 years of hesitation, I wanted to do something for myself. I started my efforts right away and managed to drop to 317 by the contest’s start.
The first meeting over 40 guys showed up and I was shocked how many I knew from work and other things I’ve done over the years. The atmosphere was incredibly supportive. I joined two special classes, “Fat Man” Aerobics on Monday night and Medicine Ball Workout on Wednesday night. They’ve been great and when I started using the elliptical before the classes for 30-45 minutes they got better. It’s been a month now and I’m down to 300. I’m pushing hard this week so hopefully there is more progress. I’ve altered my eating habits and so far I don’t even feel like I’m dieting. My goal is to hit 275 by spring, which is doable.
It feels good to go to weigh-in each week and be near the top of the leader board (our progress is posted for the whole compound to see). I’d like to be in the top 10 when the program ends in October, so keep your fingers crossed. Hopefully I can keep it off so when I come home the idea of finding a date every so often isn’t completely fantasy!
I loved being in a relationship and honestly dating at 46 doesn’t sound too bad. The lack of pressure to have kids and be “successful” will be nice. I figure at that age you are who you are and there’s less chance of growing apart like my wife and I ultimately did. (I still think we could have worked through most of that if I hadn’t been given this forced retirement in the middle of nowhere, but that was the hand I was dealt and there is no point of dwelling on what could have been). Middle aged dating has got to at least be simpler than its high school and college counterpart. I mean anything minus raging hormones is easier, right? I hope…
Honestly, I don’t know if I’ll ever officially get re-married, it’s certainly not off the table, but I fully intend on enjoying the bachelor life for sometime. It’ll be nice only having to worry about myself. For the first time, I can take financial risks (like starting my own coffee house) without needing to support a wife. I never could have subjected her to such fiscal uncertainty, but now there is no one holding me back. I want a woman in my life, definitely, but this time it will be someone whose interests and lifestyle more closely mirror my own. I am planning on having fun and focusing on life and doing things. I fully believe life is about experiences, not how much you own and that is how I’m going to live when I’m free. Hopefully there will be a woman out there whose beliefs match my own. Only time will tell.