Broader Thinking BOQ #17 Monday, October 21, 2013
My thoughts scare me. But I grow weary of being afraid. I grow weary of feeling stressed out. I grow weary of avoiding certain patterns of thinking. It would be so easy to just give up and be a depressed person and complain about how hard I have it and how badly I messed up so many good opportunities and relationships and chances I have had.
I don't know. I am a sensitive guy. I think about Ashley sometimes. Not as frequently anymore but I still do. I think about my mother. I think about how I dropped out of high school. My past drug use. Bad choices.
But when I'm in those moods I forget the progression I have made. I forget where I could have been had I not gotten myself together. Through these bad experiences I have learned the value of goals. Staying true to yourself. Self-worth. I am overall a more patient person. I am less naïve than I once was. I am becoming a man the hard way and I'm proud of it.
I'm a romantic and life is a story. I'm still young and I already have an interesting story to tell. I'm only 18!! I have so much story to write. Life to live. Progress to make.
People are going to back stab you and break your heart. People are going to hurt you. Pain is real and I'm happy I can feel it.
My brain is becoming stronger while my heart remains young. My brain is doing the heavy lifting. My brain is parenting my heart.
I did my push ups today. I'm writing in my journal. I'm good. My routine is well intact.
Didn't do much today. Just relaxed on my day off. Did a little extra exercising today. If I keep up my exercise who knows how I'll look by summer? Not really working for a beach bod but its sort of like just having a goal. Like how will my body have changed? Watched some football. Titans kinda got smacked by the Niners.
Tomorrow me and Rachel are getting some food. Something nice to look forward too. Then I might hit Daniel up. We'll see.
I'm not gonna be a total recluse any more but I don't want to really be out there as much as I have been lately either. I like being by myself. I'm going to find a nice middle ground hopefully.
Sooooo yeah a good day overall. My thoughts wandered a bit towards the end here. Got a little sad. But still a good day. :D
Number 17
Would you be willing to become extremely ugly physically if it meant you would live for 1000 years at any age you choose?
Hmmmm this is interesting. I think I honestly might. MIGHT. Not because I'm scared of death and want to live that long but because I would like to see how humans and time and culture changes. I just think it would be cool.
At the same time I might get sad becoming friends with people and seeing them die over and over again.
But I am extremely ugly so would I be able to make friends? Hmmmm
The "ugly" part of this question is actually pretty tough. While true beauty lies within the heart nobody wants to be butt ugly either. Especially for 1000 years.
This one is surprisingly tempting but while I think it would be cool to live that long I don't think I would actually agree to this. ^^^
I like living the normal life span. The human life is tragically short but that's what makes it beautiful.
So my answer is NO.
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